Fic and mix: More than a little and less than enough, by tjwritter

[ginger_lust]

Title: More than a little and less than enough
Creator: tjs_whatnot
Rating: NC-17
Pairing/characters: Ron/Draco, Ron/Gideon Crumb, Remus/Severus, Remus/Severus/Ron
Warnings/content: Highlight to read *voyeurism, angst, threesomes, first times*
Word count: 32,000 + 12 song soundtrack
Summary: Sometimes, the way you find what you want, is to first find the things you don't.

Notes: I once made a joke that when I wrote a story containing my personal OT3 of Ron, Remus and Severus, I would retire from fandom. And, while I don't think that's necessarily going to happen, this story does feel like it's a bit of a final farewell. At least it came out that way, as it refused to come neat and quick, instead it meanders and delves into places I had no intention of taking it. I hope though, that it will entertain and perhaps make the seemingly impossible of the three of these fine and remarkable men finding their peace together seem possible. Canon deviations, while slight (with the exception of them all surviving the war, of course) are intentional and hopefully won't distract too awkwardly. Finally and perhaps most importantly, thank you so much to my betas, Whatnot Cospirators and best girls, redsnake05 and la_dissonance for making the best in me better and for indulging me in all my craziest schemes. And while they are extraordinary in many ways, they are not miracle-workers, all remaining mistakes are mine alone.

Prompt: And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. Friedrich Nietzsche



More than a little and less than enough Soundtrack
(click for zip)

Opening Credits: Waiting for My Real Life to Begin by Colin Hay
House of Cards by Radiohead
Circles by As Tall as Lions
Answer to Yourself by The Soft Pack
The Royal We by The Silversun Pickups
The Mission by Puscifer
Damn Things Over by Empires
Giving up the Gun by Vampire Weekend
The Man who would be King by The Libertines
Vindicated by Dashboard Confessional
Undisclosed Desires by Muse
Closing Credits: Ambling Alp by Yeasayer




Ron Weasley sat on the barstool, avoiding the boisterous crowd; only occasionally looking up when he heard the door open. He'd been there long before the crowd had gathered, and he'd be there when they were long gone if he had to, waiting.

This wasn't his regular watering hole, but tonight wasn't about embracing his normality, it was about stepping away from all that he knew and all those who knew him. Any minute he'd be saying his goodbyes to his one remaining friend and then setting out into a life lived no longer in a stifling closet, in hiding a shameful secret. At least that was what he was hoping to do.

No matter that he was anxiously watching the door, somehow he was still caught completely unawares when his childhood chum sat down next to him.

"Hey," Harry said, looking extremely uncomfortable. "How have you been?"

Ron barked a nervous guffaw. "Never better, you?"

Harry looked sad as he said, "Is it going to be like this from now on? Are we never going to be what we were?"

Ron took a drink of his pint before almost whispering, "I don't think we were ever what you thought we were."

Harry's expression turned to panic. "What the hell does that mean? We were never best mates? We never saw each other through the worst of times, laughed at the stupid shite that was going on around us? Just because....just because..."

"I'm gay?" Ron finished for him. It hurt that Harry couldn't even say the words, couldn't even do that one thing. How was it ever going to be what it was?

Harry forced a smile. "Yeah, that."

"You're right, we were always those. But for me there was always something else too. A part of myself that I never shared, that I don't think I'll ever be able to share and I've carried that around with all of my relationships. Not anymore. I will no longer sacrifice my happiness, my well-being for the sake of appearances and doing what is expected. I know that hurts everyone, and I wish it didn't have to be this way."

Harry just watched, listened and finally he said, "Wow. You've been practicing that little speech for quite a while, huh?"

Ron laughed. "Yeah, I guess I've had a lot of things bottled up. Obvious?"

"Well, yeah. You usually aren't that...um...articulate."

They shared a bit of semi-comfortable silence, before it stretched out too long.

"So, what are you going to do?" Harry finally asked.

"Get away for a bit."

"You don't have to, you know."

Ron's smile this time was sadder. "Sure, I'll just stay at Grimmauld Place and watch you look at me uncomfortably and shift nervously every time we cross paths, as if I'm suddenly going to attack. I'll stick around and endure Hermione's pain and anger, my mum and dad's bafflement and disappointment."

"It wouldn't be that bad."

This garnered a mirthless laugh from Ron. "You know, we like to think that we are the enlightened generation; that with winning the war we had propelled the Wizarding world and its prejudices and conventionalism out of the dark ages. Everyone loves and accepts everyone. It's a myth. Some things are never going to change, or if they do, very, very slowly."

"Well, they'll never change if the people who choose to live on the margins scurry out of Wizarding society. Where are you going to go?"

Ron shrugged. "I really don't know. Just away."

"Isn't there someone you could talk to?"

"You mean other then you? Because you'll be there for me no matter what, right?"

Harry swallowed. "I'd like to be. But I don't know what to say. Don't know what you need. What I meant was--isn't there someone who would know what you're going through that you could talk to?"

Ron took another swig of his drink. "I don't know. My sort scurries into the margins, right?"

Harry didn't answer for a long time. "There has to be more of your..."

"Kind?" Ron finished for him.

Harry couldn't look at Ron who just laughed. "I'm sure we're all over the place. You remember all those gay orgies at Hogwarts right? And all the gay porn at Florish and Botts."

Harry laughed now too. "Well, okay, maybe not. But still. There has to be others."

Ron didn't say what he was thinking. Yes, there had to be or he was going to have a very sad, very isolated life.

After a few more drinks and a few more awkward exchanges, Harry stood to go. Ron thought it looked rather like he was preparing to flee. Something about Ron's sister needing to see him about something. Ron was barely listening. It was over. Harry was leaving, and soon after, Ron would have to step away too and step into a new, unknown life separated from all that he knew. Excitement mixed with fear.

"You'll keep in contact, yeah?" Harry asked, buttoning his traveling cloak.

"Yeah. Sure. As soon as I'm settled."

They stood awkwardly, not knowing if a hug or a handshake would do better. Finally Harry reached up and placed his hand tentatively on Ron's shoulder. "We'll always be mates. No matter what."

Ron smiled his first true smile of the night. "No matter what," he repeated, pulling Harry into a one-armed hug.

***

Ron woke up the next day feeling completely let down. He had thought that conversation, the hardest of the conversations he'd had, would somehow release him of all that had been holding him back. That after it, he would have a cathartic sense of peace that would sort of propel him into a course of action. Instead he woke up that morning in the room he had let at The Hogs Head a week before, when his life had blown up around him and his first thought was that it always was these days; now what?

He could still taste the beer from the night before on his tongue. Well, there was something solid and forward moving he could do, he thought as he rose, clutching his head with a moan and heading for the bathroom. While he was in there, he downed a hangover potion and ran a bath. He could take his time and relax and just go with the flow. After all, he didn't have anything else on his schedule.



After the bath and a lazy lunch, he found himself down in the almost empty tavern. What else was there to do when you lived over the establishment? That was the excuse he was using anyway.



He could get used to this drinking by himself thing. There was something peaceful and uncomplicated about it. He'd always thought he'd need to be surrounded by people as he always had been, but this was nice, he could get used to...



"May I join you?"



Before he even recognized the voice as familiar Ron nodded enthusiastically.



"How've you been?"



Ron turned to the voice. "Remus, wow, long time."



Remus Lupin smiled at Ron before catching the barman's attention and motioned for two of what Ron was having.



"Yeah, you too. How have you been?" Remus asked.



Ron shrugged. "Never better."



"Really? What brings you to Hogsmeade?"



"Staying upstairs," Ron answered.



"Really?" Remus asked again. "Why?"



Ron shrugged again. "Dunno, seemed like a nice a place as any."



"What about The Burrow, or with Harry? Weren't you and Hermione...?"



"Weren't we what?" Ron asked, trying not to show the irritation that question elicited.



Remus studied Ron before answering, "Forgive me, but I'd always gotten the impression that you and... well that Hermione and you were..."



"You weren't the only one, believe me. But no, funny how things turn out."



"What happened?" Remus asked, taking the drink that was plopped before him and sliding the other one down the bar to Ron.



Ron raised his glass in salute as thanks and then took the drink to his lips, mumbling behind it, "Turns out, she wasn't my type after all."



"What do you mean?"



Ron shook his head. For once, he was cursing the lack of a rumor mill. Wasn't it already out there? Didn't everyone know that he had broken Hermione's heart? His mother's heart? His entire family's heart? Why did he keep having to relive it?



"You ever had a realization about yourself that just smacked you upside the head and no matter how much you tried to repress it, tried to pretend it wasn't real, it just wouldn't leave you alone?"



Remus swallowed. "I guess you could say I'm familiar with that phenomenon."



Ron blushed. "I didn't mean you being a werewolf. You couldn't delude yourself about that."



"I wasn't thinking of my being a werewolf," Remus answered.



"Oh," Ron said, then looked really hard at Remus. "Oh."



"Oh?" Remus asked, sharing Ron's look of dawning realization. "Oh."



After a moment of shocked, jaw-drop, Ron started to laugh. "That was the shortest coming out conversation ever."



Remus shared a smile. "Yeah. Surprise."



"How long?" Ron asked.



"How long what?" Remus asked.



"How long have you known?"



"That I was gay? Hmmm. I guess as long as I've known about feelings and what they meant. You?"



"I guess it's true what they say. I'm a bit slow about things like feelings and what they mean. I didn't get it sorted until I'd gotten myself in deep trouble and made it impossible not to hurt a lot of people in the process."



Remus raised his glass. "I don't know about you, but I'm going to need some more refreshments."



It was Ron's turn to get the barman's attention.



***



The drinks continued to come for hours after. Ron couldn't remember what exactly was discussed after the realization that they weren't so different and that, like Harry had guessed, there were more gay wizards then Ron would have ever imagined. He remembered that conversation, or at least parts of it.



"So, are you... with anyone?" Ron asked, hoping it didn't sound like the worst pick up line known to man.


Remus choked on a laugh and Ron blushed.


"I'm sorry," Remus said, patting Ron on the back. "It was a bit of a shock, that's all. And yes, yes I've been with someone for a long time."


"Great," Ron said, still feeling ridiculous. "Anyone I know?"


This time it was the drink that Remus choked on. "Ummm. You might have heard of him."


Ron stared at him, waiting for him to tell him who. He waited a long time. Remus just laughed. "So what have you been doing with yourself, you know, besides having a sexual identity crisis?"


"I've been sort of helping George with the shop. But he seems to have everything under control and..." he trailed off. This time Remus was the one to wait.


"So, what are you going to do?" Remus finally asked.


Ron mumbled something that was barely above a breath.


"What was that?" Remus asked again.


"Find a place to belong," Ron mumbled again, this time just a bit more intelligible.


Remus didn't say anything, just ordered them both another drink.


***


"No. Absolutely not. No, No, No."


Remus continued to lean against his desk and watch Severus Snape rave, pacing back and forth.


"No."


Remus's arms were crossed and an eyebrow raised. He waited.


"I think it's a really bad idea. I mean, what are we, a home for hopeless homos?"


Remus smiled, knowing he'd almost won. "No, but it does have a bit of a ring to it, no?"


"No." But Remus detected the slightest of a twitch in the corner of Severus' mouth. Almost.


"Do I need to remind you?" Remus asked.


"What?" Severus said, stopping his pacing long enough to look at Remus.


"Two words. Draco Malfoy."


For a moment Remus thought he had over-played his cards. Severus had returned to his pacing but stopped to turn abruptly with a glare. But then he slumped, defeated.


Remus pounced on him. He knew after all these years; the one thing to do when he'd won any sort of battle with Severus was not to gloat. Instead he had to appease the man's shame with quick, yet thorough love making.


***


"Are you sure?" Ron asked as Remus stood at his doorway urging him to pack his bags.


"Absolutely, this is no place for...um...human habitation. You need to be somewhere that you can work on yourself and be with people who know what you're going through. If we can remember that far back."


"And your... um... partner doesn't mind? Is that what they're called?"


Remus smiled. "Yes, some prefer that term. Some say boyfriend, lover, significant other, life partner, soul mate, all of those."


Ron picked up his bags. "And what do you call yours?"


Remus came and stood beside him, took his arm, "I call mine..." he spun them both, Apparating them. When they arrived, he continued as if no time had passed, "Severus."


And there was the man, standing before them.


The room felt to Ron like it was still swirling, but his vision was pinpointed to the man standing before him. Ron couldn't stop his jaw from dropping and powerless to shut it again.


"Ah, well, I can't say I've missed that look," Snape finally said, waking Ron up.


He looked from Snape to Remus and back again.


"You," he pointed to Snape, "And you," now to Remus, "are... are..."


"Partners? Lovers? Significant others? Life partners? Soul mates?" Remus said. "Yes, I suppose we're all of those things."


"What...? How...? When...?" Ron stammered.


Snape rolled his eyes. "It's not that shocking is it? I mean, who else would two of the only surviving gays of our generation be with?"


Remus scowled at him. "Yes, that's lovely, Severus. Please explain to him some more that we're simply together because we're all that's left."


Now Snape's jaw dropped too, though not as absurdly as Ron's. "That's not what I meant."


"Perhaps he's not shocked because we're together, maybe he's shocked because he didn't know you were a pouf." Remus said, crossing his arms and looking markedly at Severus.


Ron began to stammer nonsensically again while Snape huffed. "I surely hope not. I'd like to think that my former students don't think about my romantic life whatsoever."


Nodding his head vigorously, Ron finally found his voice. "No, never. Not once." Thankfully, he stopped himself from shivering at the very idea of it. He had a feeling that would have not gone over well.


They all stood there awkwardly for a moment before Remus said, "Let me show you to your room, Ron."


"Yeah," Ron said slowly, still reeling from how the situation had changed. He had known Remus was with someone and yet... Snape? What was this knot in the pit of his stomach? This overwhelming feeling that Remus deserved better. It was probably true, he reasoned, everyone deserved better than Snape, but why did he care? That was the knot and he shook his head to clear it.


"So, do you still want to stay with us?" Remus asked as they climbed the stairs.


"Of course," Ron answered without thought. "Why didn't you tell me though? I could have handled that better."


Remus laughed and looked down the stairs to Ron. "I get very few chances to amuse myself. Please forgive me the slight, but your face was priceless."


"Glad I could be of service," Ron said, trying to sound madder then he was. Truth was, he'd never seen that sparkle in Remus's eyes before and he rather liked it.


"Sorry," Remus said, and he sounded less then sincere as well.


They made their way up to the second floor and down the narrow hall.


"Here you are," Remus said, opening a door. The room was small, but more than adequate with a bed, a small wardrobe, a table with a tea service and two chairs and a plush settee in a corner by the window. "We hope you are comfortable here."


"Thank you. It is very nice," Ron said. "Have you two lived here long?"


"Severus actually grew up here. We also have my childhood home but it's in the middle of nowhere and hard to get in and out of. So we use it for an occasional getaway."


Ron had barely heard any of that. "Severus?"


Remus smiled. "He does have a first name, you know."


"I know that," Ron retorted. I just don't know anyone mental enough to want to call him by it. And then a flash image of it being called out in the throes of passion entered Ron's mind uninvited and he had to turn away to hide his need to throw up. "It's just going to take some time, okay?"


"Of course it is. You have years of preconceived notions and grudge to overcome. Winning a war and being exonerated can only do some much towards healing. I do hope that you do give it a chance. You might be surprised that he's nothing like you imagined, even if he is exactly how you remembered."


Ron tried to make sense of that, but it was proving difficult.


"I'll leave you here to get unpacked and comfortable. Tea is in two hours if you'd like. We take turns preparing dinner, tonight is your turn."


Ron swallowed, and Remus laughed. "I'm kidding. I've got tonight, you can prepare something tomorrow."


"Oh, okay."


***


Tea was awkward and chilly; dinner was very much the same. Ron wondered how this was supposed to help him become who he was meant to be, but he decided to give it a week before thanking them for their hospitality and making his way out in the world. In the meantime, he wanted to busy himself as much as possible. Spending a week locked in his small room in Severus Snape's childhood home was not his idea of starting his Great Gay Adventure right.


The next day, he had a quick bath and prepared for the day before he'd even had coffee or saw anyone. When he finally did make his way downstairs, he was hoping to find the rooms empty so that he could familiarize himself with his new residence. No such luck. Remus and Severus were having their breakfast in the kitchen, both of them still in pajamas and robes.


"Oh, hey," he said, coming in.


"Wow, look at you, all ready for your day," Remus said. Snape merely raised his head from the paper for a moment as his only acknowledgment.


"Yeah, thought I'd go check out the neighborhood. Maybe see if I could find a job."


"Around here?" Snape asked, putting down his paper.


"Don't worry, I'm not moving in forever and ever, I'd just like to make some wages, pay my share."


"That wasn't my concern Mr. Weasley. I was just inquiring that maybe, if you don't want to work in a tedious factory, you might want to consider looking farther north. Still within Apparation distance, of course."


"Oh," Ron said, suddenly feeling 12 years old again. "Thank you. I'll keep that in mind."


"Would you like some coffee or tea before going?" Remus asked.


He really didn't. But he didn't want to be rude either. "Sure. Thank you."


Remus got up and went to get a cup and saucer for Ron. "Which would you like, coffee or tea?"


"Whichever is easier," Ron answered.


Remus came back to the table and poured Ron some coffee from the pot. "Oh, if only all our house guests were so easy to please."


Snape shot Remus a glare. Ron just blew into his coffee. "So do you two entertain a lot?"


"Is that what we're doing?" Snape asked.


Ron had swallowed a mouthful of coffee and almost spit it back out. Remus patted him on the back and returned a glare to Snape.


"Don't pay any attention to the surly one over there. He's waiting for a shipment of ingredients and they're late and so he's on edge with nothing to do."


"Some of those ingredients are very important," Snape said, giving Remus a long look.


Remus took his hand. "It will be fine. We know how to get what we need."


Snape's eyes warmed with the squeeze of Remus's hand and Ron felt extremely uncomfortable. "So, what are you two's plans for today?"


"Oh, our days are filled with action, adventure and hi-jinks galore!" Remus said.


Snape snorted.


"Alright, maybe not as exciting as that," Remus continued. "I am on assignment and Severus spends most of his days in his lab or terrorizing the local apothecaries."


"They have no right to call themselves that," Snape growled. Remus laughed.


"On assignment?" Ron asked.


"Yes. I am working on a story. Xeno is nice enough to throw some work my way from time to time. Under a penname of course."


"You write?" Ron asked.


"Yes. I am a journalist," Remus said rather proudly.


"Wow. That's great."

"Yes, it's really rather fascinating. Currently I am on the lookout for some humdinger doodad that is supposedly hidden in unsanitary watering holes. Which I have yet to find, but my searching did lead me to you."

Ron laughed. "That's what you were doing in the Hog's Head?"

"Yes. Aberforth hates it, but if he really wanted to get rid of the legend, he would perhaps, from time to time, wash a glass and think of getting the farm animals away from the kitchen. All suggestions I've been giving him for years, mind."

"What happens when you don't find any doodads?" Ron asked.

"Oh, I rarely find the things I'm sent to investigate. But I'm not ready to give up yet--"

"Not until he comes home with malaria from the search," Severus grumped.

"Or until I've run out of leads. I want to be thorough before I set about disproving claims in my articles."

"Mr. Lovegood lets you disprove the existence of creatures no one has ever seen or heard of?" Ron asked.

"Oh yes, he rather likes it, actually. It legitimizes the paper to have two viewpoints and the conspiracists really like having someone to rally against. But I like to do my research first of course."

"And, since it's all at the expense of the paper, why not?" Snape added.

"Well yes, there is that too."



***


Ron really did look for a job, a lot. Turned out though, an education at one of the finest Wizarding school in the world didn't amount to much in the Muggle world. They wanted to know where he went to University, where he got his certification, his degree, his training. Even the nightclub wanted a past history in the field, as if Ron couldn't figure out how to make a whisky sour and didn't know how to pull a tab. After a few days, he was about to give up and wander back into Wizarding London, where he'd be able to use his status as a war veteran, and his education to land any manual labor jobs. But his notoriety would also be used and there was no way to avoid all the complications that would involve. Luckily, the day he came back towards the house on Spinner's End after another day of disappointment and rejection, he passed a factory just as they were letting out for the day. Everyone looked exhausted and dejected but all Ron could see was that they all looked employed. Plus they all gathered down the street to the same pub. Those were the two things that Ron needed right then. A job and some companionship.


Seeing a man in a suit leave the building and having nothing to lose, Ron called out, "Hey, you doing any hiring?"


"You ever worked in a factory before, son?"


Ron hung his head. "What's to know?"


The man looked at him for a minute and then laughed. "Can you walk a straight line?"


"I've been known to from time to time."


"Can you climb stairs?"


"I've been told I'm the best stair climber, almost as good as ladder climbing; sadly, I'm pants at climbing walls."


"Ah, that's too bad. The only job we got requires an expert in wall climbing."


Ron smiled. "Oh, did I say I couldn't climb walls? What I meant was that I hadn't been certified, but I'm well versed in the practice."


The man held out his hand. "I like you, you're hired."


Ron shook it. "Just like that? Well, I must admit, I like you too."


"Don't declare your undying love yet. It's only a part time, two or three shifts a week job. Pay is shite, hours are shite, but it's a job if you want it."


"I do."


"Great. Show up tomorrow morning at 6 and find Barton, tell him Gerald hired you."


"Thank you Mr. Gerald, you won't be sorry."


"Just call me Gerald, and I know I won't, son."


***


That night he prepared dinner for Remus and Severus, pot roast, one of his mum's recipes. He tried not to be too excited about having a job because he knew that Severus would give him a hard time for taking one of those factory jobs he disdained. When he started caring about Severus' opinion he'd never know. When he started calling Snape Severus was a mystery as well.


They had fallen into a routine that worked entirely because Remus was there to buffer the two men who both used sarcasm as their strongest sword and shield. Remus seemed to like nothing better to hear the two snipe at each other for hours before he'd give Severus a look. The look caused Severus to grumble under his breath, but also got him to stop the bickering, for a time. After a few weeks, the look worked just as well on Ron; he just reserved his grumbling for when he was alone in his room.


The relationship between the two men still fascinated and confounded Ron. The more he got to know Remus, the more he understood the desire Severus must feel, Remus just had a soulful, peaceful presence that soothed and yet also tantalized. He was easy to talk to and Ron found himself fascinated by the stories that Remus told, having not realized how little he knew about the man. The only conversation Ron couldn't broach was what Remus possibly saw in Severus Snape. What did the greasy git bring to the table?


Ron reasoned that it was only natural that he should wonder about the two men's sex lives. He was after all living under their roof, they were after all the only two gay men he knew. It was perfectly reasonable. What seemed to Ron as odd was how interested they were in his personal life. He would say his sex life, but first, he'd actually have to have had sex.


"Don't you want to go out? Find a club? Spend your week's wages buying drinks for young men and having adventures?" Remus asked him on his second weekend after landing his job.


"Or perhaps you'd like to go down the street to where the rest of the blue-collars spend their wages before going home and beating their wives?" Severus said with a smirk. He'd been taunting Ron since he'd finally confessed that he was working in the factory.


Ron smirked, but Remus disregarded Severus as if he hadn't even said anything. "We just worry about you."


"We do?" Severus said.


"Really? Why?" Ron asked.


"You are a young man in the prime of your life, you should be out having fun."


"Okay. Where do you guys want to go?" Ron asked.


"Us?" Remus and Severus said together.


"Well, I'm not going to go to the clubs by myself. You are the only other gay men I know."


"We're old," Remus argued.


"And not interested," Severus added.


"Me either," Ron said, getting up from the table and waving his wand to have the dirty dishes follow him into the kitchen.


***


"Pathetic," Severus mumbled.


"A bit sad, yes," Remus agreed. "What he needs is to find someone his own age to introduce him to the scene."


Severus pretended not to notice the look Remus was giving him out of the corner of his eye. A smile slid across Remus's face and Severus stood up and walked to the door.


"No."


Remus stood up and followed him out of the room. "Why not?"


"Because it's a horrible idea."


"I'm not suggesting that we play matchmaker--"


"Yes you are." Severus said as he made his way up the stairs, not knowing where he was going or why.


"Nonsense, Severus, I'm just saying we invite him over for dinner. It might be nice for Ron to know he's not alone," Remus said, following Severus, as if knowing exactly where they were going and why.


"They have nothing in common and may still hate each other; it's a terrible idea."


"They have lots in common. They're both young gay wizards, they're both from a wizarding family and have been shunned from their families--"


Severus turned mid-step to look down on Remus on the stair below him. "You can't possibly compare Arthur Weasley's disappointment in his son with Draco being disowned."


"For a Weasley? I imagine having Arthur disappointed in you feels very much like being banished."


Severus didn't say anything for a moment. Finally he conceded. "Perhaps."


"So we can invite him for dinner?" Remus asked.


"What? I didn't mean..." Severus's shoulders slumped. "Fine. But don't blame me if this ends badly."


"Of course not," Remus said, nuzzling his forehead into Severus's chest.


Severus stiffened for a moment, but as Remus walked his fingers up the fabric of his chest and started nimbly working the buttons as he went, Severus relaxed with anticipation. He hoped that Remus never figured out that there were very few things anymore he cared about enough to argue over, but watching Remus try to work him over and supposedly change his mind always had a pay off. He smiled as Remus snaked his hand along the flesh of Severus's hip and along his back, up to his neck, lightly pushing Severus's head down to meet his lips.


"Will I be able to say I-told-you-so when it all falls to shite?" Severus whispered, breaking the kiss.


Remus growled and licked Severus's lip, slithered his tongue back into Severus's mouth. The kiss lasted long enough for Severus's hands to twine themselves around Remus's shoulders. This time it was Remus who broke the kiss.


"And what do I get if they wind up living happily ever after?"


Severus smiled and leaned into Remus's ear to whisper. "Never going to happen."


Remus stepped up so that they were standing on the same step halfway up the staircase. Severus wrapped his arms tighter to keep them from tumbling.


"But if?" He arched an eyebrow, brought his hand to cup Severus's crotch.


This time it was Severus who growled, as he took Remus's hand and pulled him up the rest of the way to the landing.


***


Setting the dishes to soak, Ron had come back to the dining room just in time to see Severus and Remus on the stairs. He couldn't hear what they were saying, but he watched with a blush as they kissed and groped each other. He thought he'd be disgusted by the mere idea of seeing Severus Snape entangled with anyone, even Remus. But he couldn't deny, no matter how hard he tried--and he tried, Merlin did he try--that he was...um...fascinated by what he saw.


Licking his lip, he watched them stumble up the stairs and despite his desire to be anywhere else at this moment, he found himself slinking towards the stairs, following their ascent with his eyes. He stood at the bottom of the stairs and watched as Severus pushed Remus against the hallway, leaned into him, dragging his tongue from Remus's throat, up to his jaw and then to his ear, where he bit down before whispering something in his ear. Whatever he said caused Remus to throw his head back, wrap his leg around Severus and grind against him. As he watched Severus thrust his hips into Remus, Ron noticed that he was painfully hard himself. He refused to even contemplate that watching Severus Snape and Remus Lupin being intimate had anything to do with his current predicament. Best just to take care of it and try and forget it.


Pressing down hard at his crotch, he made his way to the nearest loo, thanking Merlin that it wasn't on the second floor. The door locked, a Muffliato cast and his trousers and pants around his ankles, Ron leaned against the washbasin and reached for some soap, making a lather as fast as he could, needing to touch himself so much.


Merlin, what I really need is for someone else to touch me, he thought as he wrapped his fingers around his cock and stroked. He continued to stroke himself, his breath ragged and his mind whirling and he thought of what it would be like to have someone else's hand on him, someone's tongue in his mouth, someone frotting against him, needing him, wanting him. He was ready for that. Gods he was ready. Finally.


***


Ron came home the next night after work and saw that Remus was setting the table for four.


"Are you guys having company? Should I, um, make myself scarce?"


"What?" Remus asked, placing the china plate next to the crystal glasses. "Oh, no. Well, we are having a friend for dinner, but you're more then welcome to join us. In fact, we really hope that you do."


"Oh. Okay. Just let me go and freshen up, okay?"


"Yes, exactly. Go, and we'll continue to prepare for our guest."


"Great," Ron said walking towards the stairs. "Hey, is this guest anyone I know?"


Remus looked up. "What?"


"I said, is the guest anyone I know?"


Remus looked down and busied himself with the cutlery. "Um, yeah, you might have heard of him."


Ron stopped and walked slowly to the table. "Yeah?"


"Yeah," Remus answered, not looking up.


"Remus?" Ron started. "You remember the last time you said that?"


Ron watched as Remus continued to try and hide his face, but he heard the smile in his response. "Oh yes, I remember."


"And...?"


"And you remember how much enjoyment I got from that?"


Ron groaned. "Fine. But I can't be held responsible for your fine china..." he stopped and looked at the table again. "Fine china... good silver..."


Remus looked up.


"Who exactly is coming to dinner?"


"You'll see," Remus sang. "But you really ought to go and have that bath now."


Ron looked skeptical but didn't say anymore as he went upstairs.


"I've told you this is a bad idea, right?" Severus said, leaning against the door frame, arms crossed.


"Duly noted," Remus answered, continuing his preparations. "If nothing else though, it should be fun to watch."


Severus grunted. "If you say so. But Mr. Weasley wasn't wrong. Should we really be putting out our finest dishes when there is a good chance that hexes will be flying?"


"Like that would be the first time we'd had to repair these dishes. You do remember our own beginnings don't you?"


Severus watched him put the finishing touches to the table as a realization came over him. "Is that why you are doing this?"


"Is why what?" Remus asked, looking up finally.


"Your burning desire to put Ron and Draco together. Is it because you see us in them?"


"What? No. Of course not," Remus argued, hiding his face again.


Severus came to him, putting his hand on Remus's forearm. "Remus, Draco is not a new me and Ron is nothing like you."


"I think he's more like me than you want to admit, but it's not about that really."


"What is it about?" Severus asked, standing close behind Remus, his hand still on Remus's arm.


Remus stood up straight before leaning into Severus.


"It's not like I think they'd work because we work. It's just that I can't help remembering what it was like for us, being young and confused. Imagine where we would be if it hadn't been for Albus and Moody. If they hadn't been there for us."


Severus wrapped his arms around Remus. "So, now, not only are you comparing us to those two dunderheads, but also I am Moody to your Albus?"


Remus smiled and took Severus's hands in his. "Maybe I'm the Moody to your Albus. You are wise after all, and I am scarred and surly."


Severus smiled against the side of Remus's neck. "Oh yes, you are very grizzled and ornery."




***


Ron tried not to put too much thought into what he put on, but he couldn't help being nervous as he pulled the green cable-knit sweater over his head. He knew something was up and that he was in for a set-up of some sort. He was determined not to give Remus the joy of making a fool of him again. Well, not too much joy.


He stood at the top of the stairs and listened to the voices below. The guest had arrived, Ron was sure of that, he heard three distinct voices, and yet he couldn't make what they were discussing or who was who. With a deep, resigned breath, he made his way down the stairs, fighting the urge to hold his wand out in front of him. Prepared for a need to attack. When he approached the sitting room and saw their guest, the curse was on the tip of his tongue, but what actually came out was:


"Son of a bitch."


"Watch what you say about my mother, Weasley," Draco Malfoy drawled.


"Malfoy," Ron said as way of greeting.


"Fancy meeting you here," Draco said.


"We were just preparing a drink for Draco, would you care for one as well?" Remus asked.


"Yes please, strong as you have."


Remus smiled. "Two doubles coming up."


"So you're the houseguest they've been telling me about?" Draco said.


"Yes, and you must be the mystery dinner guest?"


There was a long silence.


"Oh, this is going to be great evening filled with engaging conversation, I can tell already," Severus said with a smirk.


"Well, we can't all be as expert dinner conversationalists as you, dear Severus," Draco retorted.


Ron smiled. Maybe Malfoy wasn't as disgusting as he had presumed.


Remus returned with a tray of glasses filled with amber liquids. "So, were you two telling Ron stories of when Draco was staying with us?"


"No, we hadn't gotten to that," Severus answered.


Ron looked from Remus to Draco to Severus and then back to Draco. "You? Stayed here with them?"


Draco forced a smile. "I guess that was Remus's not so subtle way of telling you that I too am a homo. Wasn't it Remus?"


Blushing, Remus placed the tray on the coffee table. "Well, might as well get it all out in the open, right?"


"Absolutely," Ron answered, taking his drink and sitting down. His nervousness gone now that he knew he had absolutely no interest in being set up. He smiled and took a swig of his drink.


Draco, apparently, felt similarly and so began goading Ron. Some things just would never change.


"So, I always wondered about you and Potter. Come on, tell the truth-- you two? In Gryffindor Tower?"


"Oh, wouldn't you like to know?"


"Ron?" Remus said, blushing.


"I'm only joking. No, Harry is very much not gay and is very much in love with another Weasley all together."


"Ah, more's the pity," Draco said, taking a sip of his drink. "He is so very pretty, don't you think?"


Severus snorted.


"You would have been sadly disappointed," Ron said, holding up his pinkie.


"Really?" Draco asked at the same time that Remus did a spit take. "Poor Ginny."


"Well, this evening got sordid fast," Severus said.


"Very," Remus agreed sounding scandalized.


"Sorry," Ron and Draco said together.


There was a long silence after this, as if none of them had anything to say that wasn't filled with innuendo and double-entendre. The silence became uncomfortable and Ron tried to stifle a nervous laugh. The attempt seemed to set Draco off and they both turned red trying to control their guffaws.


"What are you two, twelve?" Severus asked.


Ron cleared his throat. "So Draco. When did you stay here?"


"Pretty much right after school. Father wasn't too thrilled with the sort of friends I was bringing home and began to suspect that a fair few were more then school chums."


"School chums? Please tell me you, Crabbe and Goyle weren't..." he couldn't continue.


"Gods no."


"So, your father kicked you out? Cut you off?"


"Removed me from the family estate, yes. Cut me off? If only he could. Turns out, magical wills are impossible to break no matter how many boys your son spends his time with and what he does with those boys. My grandfather was very generous to his only grandson on his death bed."


"How fortunate for you," Ron said, biting down on his sarcasm. "How did you wind up staying here though?"


"Why don't we continue this conversation around the table?" Remus said, rising. They all did likewise.


After sitting down, placing the cloth napkins on their laps and complimenting the chef on the spread before them, Ron asked again. "So, how did you come to stay here?"


"Well, after I was tossed, I got myself a sweet flat in London and started doing what you do when you've finally been set free to do all the things you want to do. You know how it is, right? That urge to try everything, to be with anyone."


"Yeah, totally," Ron lied.


"Meanwhile, I guess my father went to my godfather rather put out. Blamed him for the way I'd turned out. As if it were catching."


"You're godfather is gay too?" Ron asked, wondering if everyone was all of a sudden.


Severus cleared his throat. "I am Draco's godfather."


"You are?" Ron asked.


Severus nodded.


"Interesting. I guess that answers that question," Ron said, more to himself then to anyone.


"Answers what question?" Draco asked.


"Oh, just the favoritism. It makes sense now is all."


"Favoritism?" Severus asked, voice pitched to that dangerous tone both Draco and Ron remembered from classes. "A Gryffindor member of the Golden Trio is going to make claims about favoritism?"


Ron conceded with a nod, not because he agreed with the assessment, but because he wanted to hear the rest of the story.


"So Severus came to gather me up and make me see the error of my tartish ways."


"How long did that take?" Ron asked.


"FOREVER!" Remus said with a laugh.


"Yeah, it seemed like that at the time, I agree. But I won't say it was all bad. I had a lot of fun. After awhile, though. You know."


"Oh yeah, tedious," Ron said into his drink, feeling like the biggest virgin ever to live. Remus wiped his mouth with his napkin and winked reassuringly to Ron.


"So, what about you?" Draco asked.


"Me?"


"Yeah, what brought you here?"


"Ah, well... after I realized the feelings I had weren't going to go away, and more importantly, the feelings I was supposed to have were never going to come, I just had a bit of a breakdown and came out to pretty much everyone at the Sunday night dinner table. It did not go over well, as you could imagine."


"I bet. What did Granger do to you?" Draco asked.


"Oh, it was the worst. She was very polite. She gave me that, 'But of course' look. Was really, really understanding but I saw it in her eyes and it... well..." he looked around the table, gauging just how much he would be mocked. They all seemed interested, and surprisingly free of ridiculing gazes. "It broke my heart. I needed to get away. Sort myself out. Became comfortable in my skin without putting my family through anymore sadness and disappointment."


"Ever the noble Gryffindor," Draco said, raising his glass. Ron glared at him, but there was no bite in it.


Remus got up and began clearing the table. "Hey, I have a great idea. Draco, why don't you take Ron out and show him where the fun is being had these days."


"What?" Ron, Draco and Severus said at the same time.


Remus raised his free hand to ward off the onslaught. "It was just an idea. Ron needs to get out there, Severus and I don't. You know all the places to go, Draco. It just seemed like a good idea. Nothing sordid was being suggested. No matchmaking."


They all gave him a look.


"I promise."


Severus looked out the window at the sunset and inexplicably agreed. "I think that is a great idea, actually."


Draco followed Severus's eyes and suddenly agreed as well. "Sure. Sounds good. Ron, what do you say, you up for a bit of night life?"


"Um...sure," he said, feeling there was something going on, but he suddenly realized this probably was his only opportunity to get a the lay of the gay man land. "Let me just go change."


"Right, you'll be way too warm in that sweater. Wear something that brings out your eyes...and hurry."


He took the stairs two at a time and then stood in front of his wardrobe for a long time fretting over an outfit. Finally, out of desperation he threw on a tight black t-shirt and a pair of grey denims. He didn't know what everyone else would be wearing, but it wasn't like he was looking to score. Not really.


"Perfect," Draco said when Ron returned. He threw Ron's jacket at him and shouted good byes into the sitting room. "Let's go."


"Shouldn't I say bye and not to wait up?" Ron asked.


"Nah, it's okay. They won't wait up, believe me."


"Alright."


Once they were out of the house and walking down the street Ron asked, "What was all that about? Why were you and Severus so keen to get us out of the house all of a sudden? Why are you taking me out and in such a hurry to get there?"


Draco didn't answer, just pointed up to the sky before taking Ron's arm and spinning them.


Ron was still looking up when they stopped spinning in another part of London all together.


"Wha...?" Ron was about to begin his questioning all over, but then the cloud covering shifted and he saw the luminous full moon hanging in the sky. "Oh, right."


Ron couldn't believe that he had all but forgotten about Remus being a werewolf. He just seemed so normal.

He would have thought about this more, but Draco had his elbow and was tugging him along to the building down the alley, where an electronic beat was pounding and neon lights illuminated cocktail glasses and beer brands.

Ron stopped, forcing Draco to come up short beside him. "Is this a Muggle place?"

"Sort of," Draco answered. "It's owned by a Wizard, but when he opened it as a gay bar, he also opened it to Muggles. There just weren't enough of us to keep the place viable. I would think someone like you would love a place like this."


"Someone like me?"

"Weren't you one of the ones fighting for Wizard-Muggle Intergration?"

"Weren't you being groomed to be a baby dictator?" Ron asked, deflecting. Truth was, he really didn't know all that much about Muggles as a whole, and even less about the sort that would be inside that building.

Draco rolled his eyes. "Well, don't worry about it, the Code of Secrecy holds strictly to their name. They forbid magic inside the premises, confiscate wands along with Muggle weapons. They have sensors to detect wandless magic and their staff of Watchers is very good at making sure that conversations involving magic are soon forgotten by Muggles."

"The Code of Secrecy?"

"Yeah, catchy huh? Come on, it's a very relaxed and chill environment, you'll love it," he again tugged at Ron's elbow.

Ron wasn't so sure when he was stopped at the door and asked to relinquish his "weapon." Casting a wary glance at Draco, who was removing his wand from his breast pocket, Ron slowly pulled his own out. They were taken and he was given a slip to reclaim his back at the end of the night. When he stepped past the velvet ropes at the entrance and into the large cavern beyond, his unease was intensified. It looked anything but relaxed and chill. It actually looked like the epitome of chaos.

The metal mesh balcony they were standing on seemed to be supported by chains and swayed over a den of a dance floor. Pulsating repetitive music blared below with multitudes of sweaty men moving in almost slow motion through the strobe lighting and smoke machines. The balcony wrapped around the stone walls and directly across from them was a bar that Draco made a path towards. The amount of people shocked and slightly unnerved Ron. He hadn't seen a crowd like this since the World Cup and he remembered acutely how that had turned out. Muggle tortures and a hazy Dark Mark played inside his mind.

He looked down at the hand that had been clutching him, saw the scar of the burnt flesh around the underside of Draco's wrist where his own Dark Mark had been seared and burnt away moments after Voldemort's fall. They arrived at the bar and Draco saw where Ron's eyes were focused.

"We all have our scars, our reminders of what we've done, what we overcame, don't we?" Draco asked, running his fingers lightly against the scars wrapped around Ron's forceps.

Ron swallowed, suddenly realizing how dry his throat had become. "Sometimes I think it's the only thing we all have in common."

"Sometimes I think it's more then enough to have in common with anyone," Draco replied before turning to get the bartender's attention.


***


"...and you've added the new ingredient?" Remus asked, continuing the interrogation that he went through every month.

"Yes love, it's all set," Severus answered, trying his best to soothe Remus's anxiety. He held out the steaming chalice.

"And you will be monitoring my reactions?"

"Yes, I will be observing you throughout the night. Everything will be fine." He pointed to the vial, the notepad, the pot of coffee and the syringe that Severus had tried to hide.

Remus swallowed and nodded. "So, all ready then?"

"Yes, and so are you," Severus said as he noticed the pupils of Remus's eyes change. He kissed him quickly, then as Remus brought the potion to his lips and drank in large gulps, Severus pushed him lightly to the other side of the bars and closed the door with a metallic clang that echoed through the basement prison.

Remus grasped the bars frantically, his nails already becoming deadly sharp claws. "And you'll protect Ron, won't you?"

Severus smiled with a nod, but stayed where he was, watching Remus's teeth grow too big for his snouted mouth.

The next sound to come from Remus was a whimper, a low growl and then a howl. Severus sat on the cot on the opposite wall and picked up his notebook and making sure his cup of strong coffee was close. He planned on making good use of both.

***

The drinks were incredibly good and after a few of them, Ron found himself being pulled to the stairs and down to the dance floor by Draco. He never saw himself as much of a dancer, but with the music blaring, it was hard to do anything else, and with the alcohol pumping in his bloodstream, it was hard to care just how ridiculous he looked.

Moving on the dance floor was almost impossible though and he just let himself float into the pulsating crowd, let it carry him away, grind against him. When he finally focused on his surroundings he was mildly surprised that it was Draco doing the grinding. Hot, sweaty and drunk he fell into the rhythm and grasped Draco's arse, bringing him even closer. Draco rotated his hips hard against Ron, accepting his invitation with a smile. He tugged on Ron's shirt, pulling it off over his head. Ron looked around and saw more than a few other men without their shirts and so he went with it. It did make him feel better. Especially when he felt Draco's hands all over him.

"Can you feel it yet?" Draco whispered loudly in Ron's ear.

"What?" Ron asked, putting his ear closer.

"I said, can you..." he pulled closer, grinding his crotch against Ron's leg, "feel this?"

Ron swallowed and nodded. He did feel it, and it made him painfully aware of what he wasn't feeling.

"Can we go outside and get some fresh air?" Ron shouted into Draco's ear.

Draco bit his lip and nodded, grabbing Ron's arm and pulling through the crowd.

That's not what I had in mind, Ron thought to himself. He might be new at this whole thing, but he knew what hunger looked like.

They made their way out the back panting. The instant change in temperature made Ron's bare skin prickle. He put his shirt back on.

"So hot in there," Ron said.

"It's a bit hot out here too," Draco said, looking Ron up and down.

Ron tried not to blush, but this was something new for him. Still, best come clean.

"I also wanted to talk to you, and it was too loud in there."

"We could go somewhere quieter. My place?"

"Wow, you don't mess around."

"Life's too short."

"Perhaps. But, well... I don't really work that way. Besides, I mean... it's you...and it's me. I just don't see this... I mean... do you see this happening?" Ron stammered.

Draco laughed. "Merlin no. You're way too fresh for me. Still," he waggled his eyebrows, "Doesn't mean we can't mess around a little, no?"

It was on the tip of Ron's tongue to say no, but then he thought about it. Maybe it would be good to have some less-than-fresh fun. "What do you have in mind?"

"Maybe just a bit of this," Draco said, pushing Ron against the alley wall. Pulling himself up, Draco then slid his hand around Ron's neck and puleed his face down to his waiting lips.

Ron gasped and slammed his eyes shut. Draco took the opportunity of Ron's opened mouth to work his tongue in, slow and easy. If the gasp hadn't told him all he needed to know about Ron's experience with men, then his stiff rigidity would have. His hands still on each side of Ron's face, Draco massaged Ron's jaw with his thumbs, as if relaxing him, opening him up.

It seemed to work. Moments after the kiss had begun, Ron finally reacted as he knew he should. Wrapping his arms tightly around Draco and lifting him slightly, he returned the kiss as Draco began grinding against him. If anyone in the world would have even dared to suggest that his first real kiss would come from Draco fuckin' Malfoy, he would have probably kicked them in the face, and yet, here he was, in a alley, surrounded with other people, mostly other couples doing roughly the same as them, and with another gasp, finally, finally had the proper reaction he had been expecting. Draco felt it almost before Ron himself.

Chuckling into Ron's mouth, Draco rubbed his own erection against Ron's, causing Ron to break the kiss with a groan. "Gods, that feels good."

"We're still just messing around, right?"

"Absolutely," Ron answered, unable to remove his hands from Draco's arse.

"Good," Draco said, stepping away and pulling Ron further along the alley, to a doorway enclosure. Again he pushed Ron against the wall, this time a bit rougher, a bit more impatient. This time Ron pulled Draco to him, his hands cupping Draco's face as Draco began to rub his hand against Ron's crotch through his trousers.

Ron pumped into Draco's hand as he dove his tongue deeper into Draco's mouth, tasting him, losing himself. When he felt Draco's fingers working the fastenings to his trousers and heard the zip, he found himself again.

"Here?" he asked with a gasp.

"Shhh," Draco soothed. "I just want to touch you. But if you'd like we can go back to my place. Of course, we'd have to go back to the club, wait in line, retrieve our wands."

Ron groaned.

"Or," Draco reached down between Ron's flesh and his pants, grazing Ron's cock, causing it to twitch. "We can take care of this right here."

Ron licked his kiss-bruised lips and nodded, face flushed with want or nervous embarrassment, he wasn't sure. Draco ran his fingers up Ron's length slowly. Ron whined and pulled at his trousers and pants.

Draco slapped his hand away with a laugh and pulled his own trousers and pants down. While Ron watched curiously, Draco took both of their cocks in his hand and squeezed them together tightly for a moment before he started stroking. Ron leaned his shoulder against the wall and jutted his arse and pelvis towards Draco as he increased his speed, squeezing them together even tighter. Ron's hands were splayed flush against the bricked wall, as if they didn't know what else to do.

It didn't take him long to come and as he did, Draco continued to milk him in long slow strokes, bringing himself to completion moments later.

Ron's heart was beating furiously and Draco mumbled a Cleansing Spell through deep breaths.

"How did you do that?" Ron asked.

"That?" Draco asked, pantomiming a jerk off.

"No dolt, I know how one does that, I mean how did you do that magic?"

"Oh that. Well, hang out here long enough and you'll get really good at wandless magic too. I refuse to walk around the club wet and sticky, I don't care how much they hate when we use magic around the innocent sensibilities of the Muggles."

Ron couldn't argue. Not really. He was barely listening truth be told. He was still stunned by what had just happened, and where it had happened, and most importantly, with whom it had just happened.

"We cool?" Ron asked.

"Of course. You wanna dance some more or have you had enough?"

"Honestly? I think that bit there has done me in for tonight."

"Ah, we need to work on your stamina," Draco said, smiling.

"We do?"

"Right, you do."

"Right," Ron said, pulling himself back together. "And thank you."

"For what?" Draco asked.

"For showing me the sights and a good time. It wasn't anything like I expected."

"Yeah? Well, there's plenty more to see. Maybe I could introduce you to some friends next time."

"Sounds good," Ron said, hoping there was no metaphor in there anywhere.

***

That night Ron had gone to bed a bit worried about what he would think of himself the next day, and was shocked and pleased that he felt no regret as the sun peeked into his room. There was no crushing guilt or unease or any sense that he had done anything wrong. It wasn't so much that he had enjoyed himself, but that he had done so with Malfoy.

He laughed and rolled over, hugging his pillow to him. Going back to sleep though was impossible. Then he remembered that last night had been the full moon, so he got up and made his way down to see how everyone had made out. The kitchen, dining room and sitting room were all empty, so were the library and Severus's office. He was contemplating checking their bedroom when he heard a muffled snore coming from below him and saw that the door to the basement was ajar.

Setting a kettle for tea he went about preparing a light breakfast of toast and jam. He was pretty sure it wasn't suitable sustenance for a man who had gone through what Remus had gone through the night before, but then again, what was the proper breakfast for that?

Creeping slowly down the stairs with a tray, he found them in a large dungeon. Most of it was filled with a cage, it had a bunk bolted to the floor. Remus was naked and curled up in a ball, the bumps of his spine poking out, tufts of fur on his arms still. Against the opposite wall, on another uncomfortable looking bunk, Severus was slumped over a notebook that had fallen to the floor beside him. Coming a bit closer he could see that Severus had fallen asleep writing something. A long scratch of ink had been dragged across the parchment and ended where his stained fingers held the quill.

Ron was just contemplating setting the tray down and leaving them alone, not wanting to wake anyone up in case they've only just now found sleep, but as he was bending down, he saw Severus's overly large nose flare.

"Hey," Ron whispered. "Thought you might like some tea and toast."

Severus mumbled something, squinting against the sun streaming from the small, high window and then sat up with a start. "Remus."

"He's fine. Sleeping too."

Severus didn't seem to believe him, standing up and looking past him to the cage. "What time is it?"

Ron looked at his watch. "A little after seven."

"Really?" Severus asked, looking both perplexed and relieved.

"Yeah. Have you been sleeping long?" Ron asked, handing Severus a tea cup.

Severus took the offering and went to the bars, blowing on the liquid as he went. "Not too long. I must have fallen asleep soon after he finally did."

Ron stood beside him, watching the exhausted man behind the bars. "It look like he's not hurting himself too much."

"Few scraps and bruises in the beginning. His front side will need some tending. His animal self really doesn't like to be behind bars."

Ron chuckled. "I don't suppose any of our animal selves like to be behind bars."

Severus looked at Ron out of the corner of his eye. "Is that a metaphor, Mr. Weasley? I didn't know you had it in you."

"Quite proud myself," Ron answered, sipping his tea.

They were silent while they drank tea and ate toast.

"How long will he sleep?" Ron asked.

"Most of the day. I'd like to be able to take him out of there and have him be able to wake in the comfort of our room, but I haven't collected enough data yet and don't know if it's safe, for either of us."

"Is that what the notes are for?"

"Yes, I've been experimenting, tinkering and monitoring with the potion."

"For how long?"

"Years," Severus answered.

Years. It hit Ron that this is what a committed relationship was for his kind. The give and take, being there for each other and not getting on each others' nerves too much. Yes, it was like that for any long term relationship, but when he thought of his parents, the only other relationship like it, he thought of the whole family and how that might help and how it might make it harder. But the point was, they had this large family and with Remus and Severus, well, they had each other.

"So, it looks like some of your experimenting is paying off."

"Yes. There have been improvements throughout the years. Just because it's a lifelong condition, doesn't mean that it has to affect his whole life."

Ron watched Severus spit the words out and knew that he wasn't really talking to Ron, he just needed to say it. To believe it.

"No. Not at all," Ron agreed in a whisper.

There was another silence and then, right before Ron was going to ask a question to fill the void, Severus said: "Thank you for breakfast. Please don't feel you have to stay down here with us all day."

"Oh, okay," Ron said, hearing the dismissal in Severus's voice and not wanting to overstay. "Yeah, maybe I'll take a walk, clear my head."

"Sounds good. I hope Mr. Malfoy hasn't muddled it to thoroughly."

"What? Ah, no, not too much. You don't think Remus will be too disappointed if that doesn't work out, do you?"

"He'd have to be crazy to think it had any chance," Severus said with a twitch of his lip.

"Yeah, I guess."

***

When neither Remus or Severus came upstairs all day, Ron prepared dinner like normal and instead of setting the table, he set a tray with three plates and levitated it down with a bottle of wine and three glasses. He found them pretty much the same way he had that morning, only this time Remus was dressed and Severus looked a little more comfortable sprawled on the thin cot. Again it was his nose that alerted him to Ron's presence.

"Back from your walk?" Severus said after stretching.

"Hours ago. Have you left this dungeon at all today?"

"I've gotten used to living in dungeons."

"Well, I brought dinner down. It's not bread and water, but I hope you will find it satisfactory."

"We can't have everything, but thank you very much. It smells delicious."

There was a long moan from the dark corner of the cage.

Severus instantly shot up. "Remus?"

Another moan, this one more like a drawn out yawn.

"You're awake?" Severus said.

"Apparently," Remus replied, his voice gravelly and hoarse.

"Lumos," Severus muttered. A light illuminated the room, causing Remus to squint against it, and it dimmed instantly. He was scratching at his ear vigorously and very much like a dog.

Ron swallowed nervously, feeling out of place. "I brought you both down some dinner, are you hungry?"

"Famished," Remus said with a growl that set Ron's hair on the back of his neck up with shivers.

"I don't know that Remus can eat this," Severus said, pointing to the covered plates, "It was kind of you to think to do it, but he needs his meat cooked just--"

Ron pulled off the cover of one of the plates to reveal a large piece of bloodied, yet lightly charred steak.

Remus's eyes bulged, his nose flared and there was another growl, starting deep in his chest.

Severus gave Ron a questioning look.

"It's what my mum made for Bill when he visited after full moon. I left it a bit more raw then he preferred, but I did cook it a bit for flavor."

"Thank you," Remus said.

Severus gave him a look and a nod as way and Ron felt just as warmed by that then by Remus's words. "It was nothing," he said with a blush.

They ate the dinner in silence, both Severus and Ron trying to ignore the indecent amount of grunts and growls coming from Remus as he devoured his food, drinking lots and lots of water and almost the entire bottle of wine too.

***

The next morning, Ron had to be at work before the sun had even risen. After that, he went looking for a new job. Loathe as he was to admit, Severus was right, the factory was the worst sort of awful job. Lifting and carrying, monotonous and seemingly never ending there was no camaraderie, no gleam of hope in any of his co-workers faces. The drinks they shared at the end of the day's work weren't for sociability, it was to wash away the stink of failure before going to their sad lives and waking the next day and doing the same.

The problem was, he didn't know what he wanted to do. All he had wanted while at school was be an Auror with Harry, work at the Ministry like his dad. He had been good at the joke shop working with the public, but he was pretty sure he couldn't do that at a Muggle shop where not only did he not know how electronics of cash registers, calculators and computers worked, he wouldn't even know how to talk to his clientele. What did Muggles talk about? What were their interests?

His real problem, as he saw it, was that he really didn't know much about anything. Nothing practical.

It were these thoughts that brought him to the library that day. He figured if he had time and didn't have anything to do with it, he might as well keep himself busy with learning about the things he was interested it. Hoping one of them would spark a further interest, and perhaps if he were extremely lucky, a goal for his future.

The library was in a large, stone structure that looked as if it grew from the ground organically rather then built. He walked in, took one look at the chaos of too many books, too many options and walked right back out. Goals were entirely overrated, he decided.

Across the street was one of those coffeeshops that seemed to have cropped up all over the city. He walked in, saw the guy behind the counter and almost walked out again. His legs couldn't move though, and his jaw couldn't stay off the floor either.

"Malfoy?"

Draco looked up from the customer he was handing a cup to and froze. His pale skin reddening and he frantically scanned the room around him, as if waiting for more unpleasant visitors. "What are you doing here? How did you find me?"

"Whoa, relax. I didn't find you, I just came in for a cuppa, promise. The real question is, what are you doing here?"

"Looking for the Snitch. What does it look like I'm doing?"

"Well, it looks like the heir of the pureblood Malfoy family is serving the general public and those he sees below him their cuppa joe."

Malfoy snarled, then turned to his co-worker. "You mind if I take my 15?"

He motioned Ron to follow him to the back exit that lead to a alleyway.

"Sorry for the paranoia back there. I just thought since I sent you an Owl this morning that you came looking for me and I wanted to know how you knew."

Shocked by Draco apologizing for anything, he almost missed the other bit of information. "You sent me an Owl this morning?"

"Yeah, inviting you over for drinks with some friends on Thursday. You didn't get it?"

"Not yet. But I left for work before the sun came up, so I'm sure it's waiting for me."

"So, this was really a coincidence?"

"Really. I was at the library and decided to come for a coffee. That's it."

"What were you doing at the library?"

Ron glared at him. "Nice. Thanks for that. But I think I asked the first question, what are you doing working here? How does that even happen?"

Draco laughed sardonically. "Oh, the irony of being a former Death Eater, Pureblood, Muggle bashing outcast in the Wizarding world is that to have a post-war life, you pretty much have to immerse yourself in that same Muggle world, or what my family has done; move away and lock yourself away from all society all together."

"Ah, they will be missed," Ron said before he could stop himself. "Sorry."

"It's alright. It's surprisingly not the first time I've heard that."

Ron smiled nervously. "So you're living in the Muggle world, but you're still, like rich, right? So again, why are you working here?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "You really have no idea how the world works do you? You know what's the difference between my Muggle trousers and your Wizard jeans?"

Ron was stumped. This seemed so far from what they were talking about. "No idea. Magical threads?"

Draco laughed. "What about the difference between a Wizard barber and a Muggle one?"

"That's easy; one's a wizard and one isn't, but what has that to do with anything?"

Draco rolled his eyes again. "You really can't be this thick. What about a Muggle bar and a Wizard one?"

Ron shrugged. "The spirits?"

"You are that thick." Draco put up his hand and rubbed his pointer and thumb together. "Money. The only difference between any of that is the kind of money it takes."

"Of course. But there are ways to transfer your huge assets in the Wizarding world to Muggle Money, isn't there? Gringotts has to have a way."

"Oh yeah, the goblins have a way. But they don't have to do anything they don't want to, who's going to make them?"

"I'm sorry," Ron said, having nothing else to say.

"Pity from a Weasley, kill me now."

"Fuck off Malfoy. It wasn't pity, it was manners."

"Yes, because you're so polite," Draco said with a laugh, then looked around the alley and stepped closer to Ron. "Hey, you remember the last time we were in an alley?"

Ron smiled. "You mean when it was dark and when we were drunk?"

"Yeah, then." He was closer now. Really, really close.

Ron bowed his head and his fringe tickled Draco's cheeks. "I also remember we both agreed it was a one time deal." He backed up and walked down the alley. "See you on Thursday," he called, raising his hand as farewell. He waited until he was around the corner to laugh at Draco's frustrated look.

***

When Ron got home that afternoon, no one was around, so he went up to his room and then took a bath before dinner. He was standing in his room with a towel around his torso when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in," he called, shaking his head like a dog.

"Hey!" Remus called, putting up his hand to fight off the water.

"Oh, sorry," Ron said, stopping instantly.

"Ah, it's okay...I just...just..."

Ron looked at Remus stuttering and watched his face flush. Following Remus's eyes, Ron saw them trained on his own abdomen and he blushed as well.

Remus pulled his eyes away and met Ron's and his face turned even redder and his spluttering speech stopped. He took a deep breath. "Sorry."

"It's okay, I just had a bath, give me a minute?"

"Sure, sure, of course."

Ron scooped his clothes up and went past Remus and back to the bathroom.

"What did you need?" Ron called as he pulled a shirt over his still wet frame. The silence was killing him and he didn't want to think too much about Remus's look. He was already half-hard just thinking that it looked a bit like longing.

Remus cleared his throat. "I just wanted to make sure I didn't scare you yesterday. I know there is a big difference between knowing someone is a werewolf and seeing someone be a werewolf."

"Oh, I'm fine. I didn't actually see you being a wolf, just coming back from it. It didn't seem to be as bad as it was? You weren't as bloodied, as um...savage yeah?"

"Severus does wonders with a potion. He's my salvation," Remus said with a sigh.

"He really loves you doesn't he?" Ron asked, coming back into the room, his clothes clinging to his still-wet body.

"You sound surprised."

"Oh no. Not that you're... um... not lovable. Just that..."

"He's capable of it?"

Ron blushed. "Yeah, sort of."

"You want to hear the secret of how I keep him interested?" Remus asked, sounding suddenly like a little boy with a big secret. Ron nodded, caught up in the game. He sat down on the bed and Remus pulled up a chair beside it and continued. "What Severus loves more then anything is a challenge, a puzzle to solve. If he is my salvation, I am his enigma. As long as he never solves me."

"And when he does?"

Remus's eyes sparkled and he leaned close to Ron. "He never will."

Ron smiled. "You sound like a Slytherin."

Remus laughed at this. "Don't I? That's why it's brilliant."

"How did... you two... how did that happen?"

"How did two people who spend their school years hating each other, letting our friends dictate our feelings, thinking nothing but the worst of each other come to be everything to each other? When I came back to Hogwarts to teach I was at my most desperate, my most depressed. Everyone I loved had been killed or incarcerated for causing their deaths. I was shunned from all society and I thought I was alone and would always be. One of the first nights there that nosy old queen Albus started making us have weekly teas with him and his partner--"


"Albus Dumbledore was gay?" Ron interrupted.


"You didn't know that?" Remus asked. "I thought everyone did."


"How would we? If he was going around telling people, I got to think Harry would be one of those people in the know, and if Harry knew anything, we all knew it."


"Perhaps. Or perhaps Harry thought it wasn't his secret to tell."


Ron shrugged. It didn't really sound like something Harry would keep from him, especially in light of his own coming out. "So, his partner? Anyone I know?"


"You keep asking that question and you hardly ever liked the answer."


"This time I have a hunch. Nosy old queens who like to play matchmakers tend to like crotchety, gnarled men, don't they?"


Remus threw his head back and laughed a long time before he stopped abruptly and said, "Who are you calling a nosy old queen?"


Ron smiled. "So, does this mean that there are like two gay wizards in every generation?"


"Yes, Mr. Weasley, you are the Chosen One," Severus said from the doorway, where he stood with his arms crossed, looking not at all amused.


Ron swallowed and blushed, wondering how long he'd been standing there.


"Don't mind him, Ron. He always gets grouchy when he finds me in the bedroom of a young, wet man."


Severus rolled his eyes, turned and walked away. Ron's blush was even deeper.


Remus stood up as if to follow Severus. "Oh yeah, an Owl message came for you this morning."


"You can just put it on the table."

"Aren't you curious?" Remus asked, his own curiosity evident in his voice.

"From Draco, right?"

"How'd you know?"

Ron leaned against the headboard, putting his hands behind his head. "Isn't it the custom that one's conquests Owl no more then two days after their first...um...meeting?"

Remus's eyes bulged and he gulped. "You and Draco...? Already...?"

Ron started laughing. "No. Forgive me, but your expression was priceless."

Remus tried to scowl. "Glad I could be of service. How did you know it was from Draco?"

"Oh, I bumped into him today. Do you know he's working at a Muggle coffee shop?"

"Yeah, by the library, how did you know?"

"I went to the library and then went for a coffee, I had no idea."

"What were you doing at the library?" Remus asked.

"I am just never going to get tired of that question," Ron mumbled to himself.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to imply anything. Only, well, the books in that collection are rather archaic, and...well...Muggle. Were you looking for anything in particular?"

Ron smiled, obviously he had found the one subject that would distract Remus from the talk of him and Draco. "Just something that would help me..." He couldn't go on.

"Help you what?"

"Figure out what I want to do," Ron whispered, looking up at the ceiling.

"You want to talk about it?" Remus asked.

Ron suddenly wished they were still talking about Draco, but he sat up on the bed and waited for Remus to come back to the chair beside him.

"I just feel sort of listless. Like I didn't mind working at George's place, and would be there still if...well, if I didn't feel like a leper right about now."

"I understand. You must have had plans for a future before you came out, before you became a leper if you will, even before...well, before George needed you at the shop?"

"All I ever thought I'd be doing is what Harry was. He wanted to be an Auror, I wanted to be an Auror."

"Did you have romantic ideas about you and Harry?" Remus asked delicately.

"No! Merlin no! Talk about complicating your life! He's always been a brother to me, like I needed more of those. But no. Besides, it would be bad enough for everyone to accept that I'm into guys, it would be something else altogether if I had designs on the love of my sister's life."

Remus smiled, as if relieved. "So, you don't want to be an Auror?"

Ron shrugged, feeling very much like he was back at Hogwarts with McGonagall asking what he wanted to be when he grew up. "I'm not sure anymore. Not sure I want to work for the Ministry. Not sure they'd have me if I did. I've been led to believe there is a bit of a policy there. I don't know if I want to subject myself to that."

"So, you were at the library looking for inspiration?"

"Yeah. But I got overwhelmed with the volume of information that was shoved at me. There are just way too many books in the world, you know?"

Remus laughed. "Do you know we have a library here in the house? It's sometimes just as overwhelming, but I would think it would be easier to find something that could interest you."

"Thanks," Ron said.

Remus stood up once again, at the door he turned back. "So, you and Draco?"

Ron threw a pillow at him.

***

Ron waited until both Remus and Severus were out of the house the first time he wandered into their library. It was through an always-closed door off the kitchen passed Severus's office and he didn't want to disturb the man's work. He could only imagine the vast amounts of vitriol spouted at him if he dared. Besides, he didn't want to be teased anymore about books and everyone's assumption that he didn't know how to read. He was determined to find something that would point him in a direction. He never thought he'd be the one to turn to books for that, but he was out of options. Yes, there was something enticing about traveling the globe looking for a calling, but there was something else about it that seemed to him like running away. He was tired of running from himself.

The first thing he noticed when he walked into the room was there was definitely magic being used. He could feel it like a sizzle of a bulb's illumination. It was also plain to see that the room had been "altered" to make it almost as big as the rest of the house combined and yet, structurally, Ron knew it was not much bigger then his bedroom upstairs. There was another kind of magic too. While he had felt overwhelmed and lost in the stacks at the Muggle library, this one seemed to close him in, welcoming him, issuing a soft hum of possibility. The feeling he could find anything, could be anything was dizzying as he ran his fingers lightly over the row of volumes calling to him.

Closing his eyes, he continued running his fingers along the spines, paying attention to the slick of some, the rough of others, gilded letters and decorations swirled under his touch. He tried to read with his fingers, investigate and really know with only the use of touch. He imagined, like the Room or Requirements, if he wished hard enough for what he wanted, it would be revealed to him. Stopping at a slick cover that marked it as a paperback from this century and not one of those ancient tomes Severus liked so much, he pulled it down. With bated breath he looked down. "Muggle History for Dummies."

He couldn't help but laugh. He carried the book along the row, stopping once more for a book on mixology and spirits. It wasn't something he'd remembered having a vague interest while at the Hogs Head, watching Aberforth behind the bar mumble and grouse every time someone ordered anything other then mead, ale or whisky. He'd wondered about all the unused bottles that had lined the back of the bar and what could be done with them. Now, he saw it as a start and nothing else.

He left the library that day with some ideas, the beginnings of purpose and a stack of books.

***

"No," Severus said, his hands crossed as he leaned against his work table.

"Why not?" Remus asked, crossing his own hands and standing tall.

"Why?"

"What do you mean why? Because I want us to," Remus said.

"I'm busy. I've got orders to fill, research to finish, papers to write."

"He can help you with all of that."

"What? Are we talking about the same person? Why would I want someone with no training, with no previous aptitude for potions, for scholarly interests of any sort, to work with me?" Severus asked, straining to keep his voice down.

Remus just stared at him. "Come here," he finally said.

Severus rolled his eyes and walked toward Remus, who clutched his sleeve and walked them to the door. He opened it slightly and soundlessly and pointed to the middle of the room beyond where Ron sat at a large round table filled with books.

"What he was and what he is are not the same thing. You of all people should know that you shouldn't judge a man based on the things they thought in their youth."

Severus shut the door again. "You do know those books are telling him how to mix margaritas and how to make the perfect martini?"

Remus shrugged. "Who cares? He's found something he's interested in and he's pursuing knowledge on his own to achieve his goal, a goal that will get him out of the factory that you abhor so vehemently, I might add."

Severus returned to crossing his arms. "Perhaps. That still doesn't answer the rest of my questions though."

"No training? No aptitude for potions?"

"Exactly."

"That's exactly why he needs us. He needs training, you saw him, he's yearning for purpose. We can help him. Come on. It'll be fun."

Severus raised his eyebrow. "You obviously weren't at your teaching post long enough to remember how very little fun is involved."

"And whose fault was that?"

"Regardless," Severus deflected. "It's a lot of work and very little reward."

"Do you need rewards that much?" Remus said with a coy smile as he shuffled the toe of his right shoe slightly towards Severus.

"From time to time," Severus answered, with an air of defeat.

Remus pounced on him, wrapping his arms around him and peppering his face and neck with kisses.

"We'll try," Severus amended, not reciprocating the affections. "But if he shows to be even slightly as willfully ignorant as he once was, all deals are off."

Remus pushed Severus against the table with a wanton smile on his face. "Are we negotiating a deal then?"

***

Ron looked up from his book when he heard scuffling and broken glass coming from what he assumed was Severus's office and laboratory. He didn't even know the man had come home, let alone passed him there in the library. Another crash and he was about to get up and check that Severus was okay, when he heard another voice. Something about the tone told Ron all he needed to know about what was going on in there. He smiled as he collected his books and stood up. Clearly, Remus is talking Severus into something again. He'd been living there long enough to learn a few of their mating rituals.

Speaking of mating rituals, he thought as he checked his watch. It was almost time to make his way to Draco's for cocktails. He wondered about Draco's friends. If they were school friends, or people he'd met and perhaps bedded in the years since being out in the world. He really couldn't say, and the anticipation was tantalizing as he readied himself.

He had prepared himself for almost anything, but what he hadn't even imagined is that they were all Muggles. A room full of them; all men, all clearly gay, but Muggle nonetheless.

Draco introduced him to the room and then asked him what he'd like to drink.

"What ever you all are having," Ron said, feeling entirely out of his element as he shrugged out of his jacket.

Draco went behind the bar as one of his friends, Lance, Ron thought, asked, "You two went to school together at that hoitty-toitty place?"

"You don't look like old money," another, Francis maybe, drawled, leaning luxuriously towards Ron from the other side of the sofa.

"Hoitty-toitty?" Ron asked, confused. "Old money?"

"Yes, Drake told us all about his posh upbringings and his fall from grace. Did you fall just as far?" This guy was practically leering.

"What... Who is Drake?"

"Yes?" Draco said, rejoining the group, handing a chilled martini glass to Ron before sitting down beside him.

"So, how did you all meet?" Ron asked, hoping to deflect attention from him and Drake.

"Ah why, where all young, gorgeous, gay Londoners meet of course," Lance said.

"Would you like your cream steamed?" Francis said with a giggle.

Ron was clearly missing a joke there somewhere. Draco, seemingly enjoying Ron's confusion leaned over, "We are all baristas."

"Barita-whatsas?" Ron asked.

They all laughed hysterically while Ron blushed and checked his watch.

"Sorry," Draco said after a moment. "We all work at the coffee shop."

"Oh, Baristas. I've never heard it pronounced that way," Ron lied, trying to fit in.

Draco nudged him and held up his glass to salute.

Ron clicked his glass against Draco's and tasted the drink. "Hmmm, delicious," he said as he tried to decipher the ingredients and measurements.

It was a preoccupation that he would be pondering on for the rest of the night as the group talked about things that he didn't know, bands he'd never heard of, movies he'd never seen and books he'd never read. If he wasn't thinking of drink mixes and ingredients then he was watching and marveling over Draco. How he just fit in, how he never let any of his past self or his magical background slip. He was like a totally different person. Ron wondered how long that had taken Draco and he mentally made a note to add Muggle magazines and newspapers to his reading list. He wasn't willing to become a whole other person like Draco, but it would be good to know things that others were interested in. He tried to wow them with his knowledge of Muggle history, but it turned out, no one really cared about the religious revolts that lead to the Renaissance.

Ron stayed as long as he could. He tried not to let Draco see how many times he checked his watch, but he couldn't help himself. He felt awkward and ill at ease. Something about his anxiety was his trying not to give away the lie that Draco had convinced these people was his life, but there was something else under the surface that was rankling him and making him itchy to escape. A few drinks later and he was feeling a bit better, but he had to get out before he had too many more and lost his ability to keep his mouth shut and nod politely and laugh when it was called for.

Draco walked him to the door, pulling him into a tight hug in the threshold. "Did you have a good time?" he whispered into his ear.

Ron untangled himself. "Oh yeah, it was--"

"Liar."

Ron smiled. "Sorry. I tried. I just don't fit in."

"It's okay. You'll learn."

Ron nodded and leaned down to quickly kiss Draco before ducking out. Truth was, he really didn't want to learn. It was true that there was a lot of things about his future that he didn't know, but becoming a Muggle and turning completely from all that he was, wasn't one of them.

***

"How was the get-together?" Remus asked the next day at lunch.

"Subtle," Severus muttered from behind his Daily Prophet.

Remus smirked at him before putting his head in his hands, and his elbows on the table, waiting not so patiently for Ron to tell him all about it.

Ron smiled at his inquisitiveness and wished he had better news. He didn't know if Remus would be overly disappointed, but he had a hunch he'd be a little.

"Um. It was...alright."

"Just alright?" Remus said.

"Well no. It was just odd. That's the best way to describe it."

"Odd how?"

"Well, I never thought I'd say this, but it was just so..."

"Muggle?" Severus finished when Ron faltered.

"Yeah. Odd, right? That it's Draco, you know? Who would have ever thought that he would find himself by becoming a gay, Muggle man? A gay, Muggle working man? It baffles me."

"You don't see yourself fitting in there, maybe in time?" Remus asked.

"Honestly?" Ron said. "No, I don't. I mean if it works for him, then I'm happy for him. But that living a lie, it doesn't work for me. Not anymore. I didn't come out of the sexual closet, just to put myself into a Wizard one, you know?"

Remus nodded, but it was Severus looking over the pages of the paper and giving him a look that actually looked a bit like pride that told Ron he had made the right decision.

Remus cleared his throat, and a minute later, did it again, this time louder and longer. Severus ruffled the pages of the paper before putting it away with an eye roll to Remus.

"Right. So, Mr. Wea...Ron, I've noticed you've been doing some reading in the library."

"Yeah," Ron snapped. If this was another rib at his ability to read he was going to lose it.

"I was wondering if you'd like a job. In your spare time. Working for me, in the lab."

"Oh. Um...what would I be doing?"

"A number of things. I will need help with research, with filling orders from time to time, errands occasionally."

"Sure, I'd like that."

"Very well."

"But, what does that have to do with my using your library?" Ron asked.

"Well, as part of your payment, I will be offering you private tutoring services."

Ron tried too late to stifle the guffaw. Severus raised an eyebrow.

"Sorry," Ron began. "But I'm just now recovering from my years under your tutelage. And you forget, I had to share a dorm room with someone who woke in terrors after your private tutoring services."

"Let me ask you something," Severus said, in a neutral voice that surprised Ron. He was expecting a spitting sarcasm, or a huffed retort. "What is the key ingredients in a Forgetfulness Potion?"

"Um, minced toad eyes, stewed rat livers and mint?"

"What kind of mint?"

"Shredded."

"Correct. And when was the last time you made that potion?"

Ron thought. "First year, I think."

"Interesting. Seems while you've gotten over my tutelage, you've still retain what I taught you. Have you ever considered, perhaps, that was the point?"

Ron looked at the floor. "I hadn't, no."

"Besides, has it ever occurred to you that I have yet to get over my years of training you?"

"Then why the offer?" Ron asked.

Remus cleared his throat and gave Severus a look. Ron looked from Severus to Remus and back again. Severus rolled his eyes. "You're going to need to work on your subtle signals, dear."

Blushing, Remus began to explain. "We just wanted to use our immense knowledge to give you another option for learning all you want to know. It's an age-old style of education that has educated the children of nobles as well as children of promise."

"Of which I am neither," Ron said.

"Are you not the Weasley king?" Severus asked with a smirk.

"Besides," Remus said. "You're missing the point. Books are great, but they will only get you so far. We can help you be a fully satisfied person. If you want to be an Auror, me and Severus are perfect tutors to prepare you for the exams. If you want to be a mediwizard, we can help you there too. You could be anything."

"Mediwizard? Me?"

"There is nothing you can't do," Remus said. And though it looked like Severus had a cutting remark, he kept it to himself.

"A Renaissance man is well rounded man who knows little something about everything, and a great deal about certain fields of study. It is a dying art, but a noble one, and a fulfilling way to spend your free time, of which you...we have plenty," Severus said.

Ron was overwhelmed, and if he had doubts or second thoughts about any of it, he would address them later, for now, he nodded and whispered, "Thank you. So, when do we start?"

"Great," Remus said clapping his hands. "Why don't we start with shopping."

"Shopping?"

"Yes. I mean, don't get me wrong, your mother's recipes are fine, delicious even, but they are designed to feed a large amount of people with a small amount of money. Food should be a luxury. Every meal should be an event. So, we're going shopping. We are going to make a meal tonight that will make us want to roll around in it and wear it like flowers in our hair."

"Flowers in our hair?" Severus asked.

Remus laughed. "I was going for decorative imagery. Over the top?"

"A little," Ron said, laughing as well.

***

After a long afternoon of food talk at the local grocer's about cuts of meat, the pros and cons of every cheese ever made in the history of the world and different varieties of mushrooms, Ron and Remus decided to go to a pub that Remus had found on one of his journalistic adventures for a few drinks.

"This reporter thing is sort of making you a drunk, huh?" Ron asked as they made their way down a quiet street in a small wizarding village in Northern Wales.

"Very funny. This place was for a different article though, so it's a bit cleaner then the places I've been going lately. But don't worry, there's enough peanut shells on the floor and dust in the glasses for you to feel at home, even if it is no Hog's Head."

"Haha, you're funny too."

They walked into the pub and Ron instantly felt at home. It was dark, but not seedy-dark; instead, casual, intimate dark. The room was large with tables littered throughout it and couches and over-stuffed chairs around the edges and in little enclaves. There was a small stage with a band playing, a bag-piper was ripping out a solo as they walked in. They found two empty seats at the far end of the bar and sat there.

"Johnny," the bartender said, coming over and shaking Remus's hand. "The usual?"

"Sure, make it two; one for me and one for my fine friend, Ron."

"You got it," the man said, then as he turned, saw Ron closer. "You a Weasley?"

Ron's eye bulged. "Yeah."

The man put out his hand for Ron to shake. "Name's Mikey, nice to meet you. Recognize that hair anywheres. How's the family?"

"Um. Good," Ron stammered.

The man left to make the drinks. Ron turned to Remus with a million questions posed in his eyes. "What sort of bar is this? How does he know the Weasleys? Do any of my brothers come here? Also, who is Johnny?"

Remus smiled. "Johnny, well John, is what I go by at the paper. This is a wizard pub in the middle of a small wizarding hamlet. It's not a gay bar if that's what you're thinking, I'm through trying to play matchmaker. Also, to my knowledge, no Weasley hangs out here, not while I've been coming here. And if any had, he wouldn't have had to ask after them, would he?"

"True." Ron relaxed. "Sorry. I guess it's been awhile since I've been in proper Wizarding company, forgive me for being a bit on edge."

"That truly makes me sad."

"Me too."

Mickey returned with two steaming glasses filled with a murky substance. "Here you go. On the house!"

"On the house?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, it's our policy. War heroes always get the first drink on the house," he saluted to Ron.

Ron raised his glass to return the salute and Remus did similarly.

"To war heroes," Remus toasted.

"To proper Wizard company," Ron returned.

They both took a drink. Ron almost gagged on his, but politeness dictated that he suffer through the awfulness of the concoction. Remus obviously wasn't that fussed about manners and spit his back into the glass. "Merlin, Mickey! How is it that you've gotten even worse at making this?"

"Well, the goblins never complain. Yet, you always do. Why do you keep ordering it?"

"What is it supposed to be?" Ron asked, still coughing.

"Karsk," Mickey grumbled. "The goblins love it, make their own moonshine and everything. This one," he pointed his thumb at Remus contemptuously, "started drinking them when he started hanging out with the goblins."

Ron looked at Remus who shrugged. "It was for a story. If made right, it's rather good."

"Yeah, if it's made right," Ron said. "You just happened to find one of the hardest drinks to make right, no offense," he said, with apology to Mickey.

"You think you could make it right?" Mickey retorted.

"Well, I've never made it before. But I'd have to try really, really hard to make it worse then this."

Remus laughed and Mickey stood back and presented his bar to Ron. "Have at it, son."

Ron swung off the barstool and walked behind the bar. It felt nice to be there, to be putting all his reading to practical use. He had made drinks for Remus and Severus at the house and had even experimented with his own concoctions, but to be behind a real bar? Scanning the layout, he pulled down three glasses from the shelf and three coins from his pocket. He placed the coins in the bottom, then on top of that he placed a sugar-cube on each one. "Now, the trick is to pour hot coffee over the sugar cubes until they are melted and you can no longer see the coin," he said, turning to retrieve the coffee pot. He smelled the coffee, shrugged and poured it slowly into each cup.

When he looked up, he saw there was a crowd around the bar, watching him. He swallowed and continued. "Goblin-made moonshine?" Ron asked Mickey.

Mickey pointed behind Ron to the shelf of bottles. "In the back, the large bottle on the bottom shelf."

Ron scanned the bottles. "Right. Okay, so then you pour the moonshine over the coffee...in such a way..." he delicately brought the tip of the bottle to the side of the glass and slowly poured a circle around the glass so the clear liquid ran down the sides, passed the coffee and layered below, revealing the coin still on the bottom. "...that you you see the coin again."

There was a applause and the room rang out with people ordering their own. "Hold on, hold on," Mickey said, standing beside Ron, reaching for one glass he held out to Remus, then one for Ron and he took the last. They raised their glasses and then each took a drink. Ron sighed. It was just as he had read it would be.

The applause rang out again as Remus and Mickey continued to chug their drinks.

"Well done," Remus shouted over the crowd of people throwing orders at Ron.

"You want a job?" Mickey asked, pulling down glasses and going to the cash register for coins.

"Seriously?" Ron said, reaching for the sugar cubes. "I'd love one."

"You're hired. Now make those drinks."

Ron smiled proudly at Remus, who smiled back just as proud. Ron had a hunch that them coming to this bar and Remus ordering that drink had not been a lucky fluke but had, yet again, been Remus meddling. Ron had to admit, the man was getting better at it.

***

Between his job at the bar and working as Severus's research assistant/gopher Ron had no problem quitting his job at the factory. He felt absolutely no guilt about just not showing up anymore. Besides, training to be a Renaissance Man was a lot of work. He spent his mornings searching for text and preparing ingredients for Severus as he described what each was and what it did and how it was prepared along with its history and future experimental usages. Ron listened and paid attention as well as he could, but had also acquired a Quick-Quotes-Quill to follow them around taking notes. He would read over them in the quiet moments after dinner or lazy weekend days. His weekdays were spent running errands and taking field trips with Remus. They discussed art, literature travel and entertainment. They visited museums, theater and bookstores all over Europe. Sometimes they would drag Severus around with them, but most of the time he would wave them away, elbow deep in sludge and bubbling goo.

Ron found more and more that he didn't only tolerate Severus's presence, but that he quite enjoyed it. The time the three of them spent together was filled with laughs, light ribbing and meaningless squabbles. They very rarely talked about any of their past histories, as if they were trying to create a new life for them that had very little to do with who they were and what they used to be to each other. Ron found this a comforting thought and hardly ever felt as if he were a third wheel. But he also knew how to make himself scarce from time to time and to never, ever walk into a room that had a closed door without knocking, or at least listening for signs it was being occupied in anyway it wasn't originally designated.

That was one of the things Ron learned pretty early on; Remus and Severus liked to fuck where ever they happened to be at the time the mood struck. This, of course, made Ron painfully aware of what was missing from his own life. The more he thought about it though, the more he threw himself into his research, his education and his dreams of a future, even if it was still a bit murky.

As part of his training, Severus and Remus insisted on teaching him things that would come up in the testing for admittance to Auror training, just incase, they said. Part of that was an advanced study to Defense Against the Dark Arts. This was one of the only times that a past lived outside this idyllic house rose to the surface. Ron could see every painful and torturous memory play out in Severus's mind as he told Ron what he would need to know.

"I know you're not going to like it Ron, but Occlumency really is an important and valid skill to have when dealing with dark magic. Not only does it prevent others from penetrating your mind, but there is also a comfort one can garner from being able to close off one's mind from things painful to reconsider," Severus said when he saw Ron bristle at the mention of the lesson.

"I trust you Severus, I do, and I understand its importance, but... well... I wasn't joking when I said I saw what it did to Harry. If you knew the suffering and pain it caused. I just don't know that I could endure--"

Severus raised his hand to interrupt. "You don't think I knew what it did to him?" he began sadly. "That was different. A million times different. I should have never been the one to help him learn and understand the power of his mind. There was too much animosity on both our parts and it was bound to be disastrous. Giving the circumstances and how important it was to teach Harry what he needed to know, and how important it was that it not be Dumbledore he opened him mind to, it was the right thing to do. Forever, I will share the blame with Harry that it did not work as well as it should have and that in the end, the Dark Lord was able to get inside the boy's mind and cause loss and devastation..." Severus trailed off, as if succumbed to his own remembrances of loss and devastation. It was a moment before Severus continued, "What I'm saying is this: it wasn't a typical lesson, and cannot be the example in which you base your hesitations."

"It's not just that," Ron whispered after a moment.

"What is it?" Severus asked in the same soft tone.

Ron took a deep breath. "I've seen the worst there is in me. I've wrestled with it and I've come out victorious, or so I'd like to think most of the time, but if I have to see that weakness, pettiness and jealousy again... I don't know. But, more importantly, more painfully, if I wind up showing it to you, showing you the very worst of me, after all the time it took to show you that there was any good, any worth in--"

Severus hastily and sloppily took Ron in his arms and was holding him close to him, comforting and simultaneously scaring the shite out of the young man. After a moment Ron melted into Severus's embrace, all the time marveling as to what was stranger, having had Draco's hands down his pants or having Severus's... Snape's arms around him, and being oddly okay with either.

After a moment he was shocked even further to hear Severus chuckle. Never having heard him openly laugh before was odd enough, but to not only hear it but feel it against his own chest as they still embraced was beyond bizarre.

He pulled slightly away from Ron so he could take the younger man's face in his hands and look into his eyes. Severus still had a dizzyingly alive, mirthful look in his eyes and Ron didn't know if he were being held as a father would hold a son or a lover would hold his beloved, but Ron swallowed nervously just in case, still holding Severus's robes in his hands.

"You can't honestly think that I would look down on your weaknesses, that I even could think less of you for having them. The whole Wizarding world knows and has extensive catalogues of every little weakness, pettiness and jealousy I have ever felt in my entire life. You honestly think that I am anyone to judge?"

"But with Harry--"

"But with Harry nothing. You are not Harry. The relationship we have is nothing like the one I had with Harry." He paused and pulled away, as if just now realizing how much he had just shown Ron all he needed to know. He turned away as he continued, "I didn't know anything about the real Harry when we started the lessons. I had assumed things about his life that I shouldn't have, based on where he had come from, the personalities of his parents, and the life I thought he'd... I didn't know the real him. Those lessons might have been horrendously painful for him, but for me they... well they changed me, I won't lie... they did. They changed the way I saw people, the way I perceived the inner lives and struggles of not only my students and acquaintances, but also myself. I liked to think myself and my struggles unique, and I reveled in my suffering as the only one who had done so to my extent. Harry taught me that wasn't the case. We all suffered..."

He trailed off and the room was silent as Ron stood there at a loss for words, not sure why Severus had told him any of that, but deeply moved that he had.

"If you'd rather it was Remus, I understand. He has skill in this field as well, and while his is not a practiced art--"

"No. If I need to do it, I want it to be you."

***

Remus stood at the doorway between the kitchen and sitting room and watched Severus, sitting beside the fire, untying his shoes. He was massaging his foot with a low moan before he noticed Remus.

"What?" he asked.

"I adore you."

"Yeah? Why?"

He walked slowly towards Severus and the look he wore as he shrugged off his sweater vest caused Severus to moan again. "If I were to recount all the reasons and whys of my adoration, we'd be here all night and into tomorrow and I'd still not be done."

Severus swallowed. "Maybe just the top ten?"

Remus bit his lip and shook his head.

"Oh Merlin, did he tell you?"

Remus shook his head again, looking down at Severus before getting on his knees before him. "Tell me what?"

He reached his hands to place them on Severus's face, just as he had done earlier with Ron. Severus sighed. "How much did you see?"

"Enough," Remus answered, pulling him towards him for a kiss. As he plunged his tongue hungrily into Severus's mouth, he took the man's hand and brought it to his crotch so that he could feel the erection.

Severus gasped into Remus's mouth and pulled him up by his shoulders as Remus pushed Severus back, breaking the kiss, his hands under Severus's knees and pulling his arse along the seat so that his crotch was there for Remus's fingers to claw at his waistband, tugging at his buttons.

***

Ron grabbed his wand, and threw on his robes. He needed to be at work in twenty minutes, but the Floo would get him there in two. However, when he made his way downstairs, about to call out his goodbyes, and heard heavy breathing and a strange slurping sound he stopped. Peeking his head around the door, he cursed his curiosity--or something else he didn't want to think too hard on--and watched Remus's head bob up and down at Severus's lap.

There goes my taking the Floo, he thought as he grasped the door jam and tried to tear his eyes away from the scene before him. Severus had his head thrown back and Ron noticed as his tongue ran along his lower lip that Severus's was doing the same. Ron gulped and turned to leave. Outside he tried to focus on anything other then his own painful erection. He was pants at Apparation even when his mind wasn't preoccupied with his libido's wants. He thought he'd have enough time to walk about the block and get some fresh air, clear his mind and still get to work in time. All he needed to do was put what he saw out of his mind, had to put his imagining of what it was like, what it would feel like...

"You're late, Ron," Mickey said by way of greeting as Ron rushed into the bar.

"Sorry, had a bit of a splinching situation I had to take care of," Ron answered, holding up a bandaged finger.

"How did you do that?" Mickey asked.

"Long story. Granted, Apparating was never my strong suit."

"Well, why didn't you just Floo then?"

"Longer story."

"Well, you'll have to tell it later, we got a line for your talents."

Ron groaned. He again wished he hadn't gotten the job while displaying how to make a very tiresome and not even that good or creative drink to a large crowd of regulars who now insisted on ordering it every time he worked. He wrapped his apron around his hips and started making the backlog of drinks. He barely registered that the band was there. He hadn't seen them perform since the first time he'd come with Remus.

As the crowd came and went, moved from the bar to the dance floor and pool tables, Ron paid attention to the band a bit more. They were not really all that good, but their bagpiper was sort of mesmerizing and sounded like he didn't belong. He was rather better then the others and he seemed to be fighting to speed them up and make them a bit more rock and roll then they were. Plus, Ron thought, he looked really good in that kilt. Even though he wasn't usually the type that Ron noticed, a lot more hairy than his usual sort actually. He'd never even paid attention to the regular amount of facial hair like a moustache; this guy had a good sized goatee and the rest of his face looked like it was in need of a shave too. His hair was back in a ponytail and he looked sort of familiar.

A few hours later, he was busy making drinks when someone at the end of the bar asked, "You're a Weasley, right?"

Since the speaker couldn't see, Ron rolled his eyes. This was a question he got about as much as he got asked to make a Karsk. "That's what my mum tells me."

A small chuckle, then, "Ron? Right?"

Ron turned and it was the hairy bagpiper. "Yeah, how'd you..."

"We were at Hogwarts together," he explained.

"We were? Why don't I..."

"Oh, you were just a ickle firsty when I left."

"You look sort of familiar. You didn't have that goatee in school did you?" Ron asked, because it was part of what sparked something in his memory, but he would have remembered a hairy student.

"No, I only stayed until end of fifth year and this didn't come in until the next year."

"So, you were in the same year as Percy."

"Right, but honestly," he leaned forward, as if about to confess, "I always had a thing for Charlie."

"What?" Ron asked choking on his intake of air.

The man's cheeks reddened. "Sorry, that was uncouth wasn't it?"

"Oh, no not that. Sorry though, I'm pretty sure he's straight."

"You sure?"

"Well, not 100%, but I'd like to think that when I came out a few months ago, if he were gay, he would have reached out to me."

The guy's eyes lit up and appraised Ron again. "Yeah, he probably would have... sorry, I forgot to introduce myself... Gideon Crumb, nice to meet you."

"Gideon, nice to meet you, again."

They smiled uncomfortably for a moment. "Gideon Crumb, hmmm, why does that sound familiar?"

Gideon shrugged. "I'm incredibly famous."

Ron laughed. "Yeah, that must be it. So you want something to drink?"

"Oh yeah, just some water for now." His eyes scanned Ron again, making Ron feel both warm and on edge at the same time. "I'll definitely need something else later though."

Ron didn't know if he should read that as a promise or a threat but his palms suddenly were sweaty and his heart was beating outside of his chest.

"To drink," Gideon said, as if it were plain to anyone looking that Ron was having a meltdown.

"Right... sure... here all night," Ron sputtered.

Gideon flashed him a rather predatory smile before turning back to the stage. Ron swallowed and turned his back to the stage, pretending to busy himself with stocking the supplies. He saw himself in the mirror that ran along behind the rows of alcohol and was mortified to discover that he did in fact look as frazzled as he felt. He looked past his reflection to the stage behind him and saw Gideon looking at him with that same knowing smile. Ron excused himself for some fresh air out in the back.

He paced back and forth, having a conversation with himself all the while.

"Is this what it feels like? Is this the normal state for a guy to be interested in another...well to be interested in anyone else?" He wasn't sure and he wasn't sure if he liked it. He liked to think of himself as pretty well put together, especially in the last couple of months, but he felt totally unhinged.

"What? You think he wants you?" Of course he wanted me. Ron couldn't deny or play ignorant to what that look was saying, even if he'd never felt anything close to this, it wasn't the first time that look had been turned toward him.

"But it's not you, it's Charlie." That just means he has a type. He stood up tall, puffing out his chest, he was more like Charlie then any of his other brothers. Yeah, but did he really want to get involved with someone who had another Weasley in his mind the whole time?

"What are you talking about get involved? He just smiled at you and you already have him declaring his undying love? Get a grip." Right, a grip. Right, right, right. He took a deep breath and headed back towards the bar. It probably didn't help that I came here tonight already on edge. And the image of Remus and Severus came into his mind again and this time he smiled. He was ready.

For the next set Ron found it hard to keep his eyes off Gideon in his kilt and found himself mesmerized by the man's fingers working the bagpipe. Yet, when Gideon met his eyes, Ron felt a large lump in his throat that he couldn't swallow away. At the end of the night, as the rest of the band was taking apart their equipment, Gideon made his way back to the bar. It was pretty deserted, the crowd hovering around the band, not the bar.

"You guys are pretty good," Ron said.

"We're shite," Gideon replied.

Ron smiled. "Okay, well, you're good."

"Thanks."

"So, you want that drink now?" Ron asked.

"Yeah, I could use a drink. How about a Firewhisky?"

"Oh, thank you," Ron said, reaching for a glass and a bottle.

"Thank me?" Gideon asked.

"Sorry. It's just, if I needed to make one more of my supposed specialty drinks, I'd lose it."

Gideon laughed. "Been a long day?"

"Sort of."

"Well, let me buy you one," Gideon said, holding up the glass that Ron just slid toward him.

"You're offering to buy me a drink? Here?" Ron said, pouring himself one.

"Fine. A different night, a different bar. You working tomorrow?"

"What do you have in mind?"

Gideon smiled and Ron swallowed. "Lots of things."

Ron swallowed the lump again and tried to match Gideon's smile. Definitely ready.

***

"So, I have a date tonight," Ron said matter-of-factly the next day at breakfast.

"Really?" Remus asked, looking up from his tea. Severus's kept his head behind the Daily Prophet were it always was at breakfast.

"Yeah. I guy I meet last night. Only I guess we went to school together. He's a bit older."

"What's his name?" Severus asked.

"Gideon Crumb. You remember him?"

But it was Remus who responded first. "Gideon Crumb? The bagpiper?"

"Um. Yeah. You know him?" Ron asked.

"Of him. He was in the Weird Sisters."

And then it came to Ron where he'd heard his name, where he'd seen his face. He had seen them perform at the Yule Ball in his fourth year. Then that next summer at Grimmauld Place before fifth year, Tonks was crazy for the band, talked about them all summer and had posters of them in the room she kept at the house.

"I knew he looked familiar."

"What ever happened to the Weird Sisters?" Remus asked.

"I don't know. Man, know I feel stupid. I should have recognized him."

"I'm sure it will be fine. Maybe he liked that you didn't fawn over him. You didn't fawn over him, did you?"

"Of course not."

"So, tell me about it, how did this come about? Where are you going tonight?"

Ron told them all about the night before, well almost all; he left out the pacing and the talking-to he gave himself and his own miserable awkwardness.

A bit of it must of showed because Remus's said, "I'm sure it will be splendid. Remember, you don't have to go anywhere you don't want to, do anything you don't want to."

"Thanks dad. I'll remember that."

Remus smirked. "Fine. But it's true."

"Don't scare the boy," Severus said, putting his paper down. "Since when does first date translate to sex?"

Remus sputtered. "I didn't mean sex! You thought I meant sex? I mean all of it. All the steps, they don't need to be rushed."

"Yeah they do," Ron said without meaning to.

"What?" both Remus and Severus said at the same time.

"I don't mean they have to be. I just mean... well... I'm ready. More than ready." He didn't even need a mirror this time to know that his cheeks were flushed with heat. What he needed was a change of subject. "But until then, what do we have on our agenda today?"

"Experimentation in the lab. It's getting close to the time where we'll need to be ready," Severus said.

Ron looked at the sick fear in Remus's eyes and nodded. "Right. Let's get to it."

They worked all through the morning and part of the afternoon. Severus had a very lucrative business in potion making, but he spent most of his time and energy in perfecting and experimenting with only one potion. Ron was amazed by his dedication to make the transformations Remus and werewolves like him went through as painless and non-traumatic as possible. He'd done amazing things and now he was struggling to find a way to allow Remus to keep as much of his human mind as possible. It was proving problematic.

"We could try it," Ron argued. They had been having this debate for almost a week already.

"Not until I have more data and you've had more experience," Severus said. Again.

"How much more data? How much more experience? It's not that big of deal. It would be safe--"

"That is where you are wrong and your lack of experience is showing. You can't know what you are suggesting. You've never been there to witness what he goes through, how harrowing it is."

"So, I'll find out. And while I'm finding out, I can do this one thing. Please? Let me try?"

Severus slumped, but didn't give up. "We'll see."

Ron knew he hadn't won the war, but he'd take any victorious battles he could. "Thank you."

Right before Severus excused him for the day, Ron asked, "When will we be starting our Occlumency lessons?"

"It's probably not a good idea to start them when you have all these hormones bouncing around and I have the potion to prepare. Perhaps after the full moon would be a good time."

"Sounds good."

"Do enjoy yourself tonight."

Ron nodded and headed to the showers to prepare for the date. He should have asked for specifics to where they were going and what they were doing and he really should have asked to meet him somewhere, anywhere other than here.

He was still upstairs getting dressed when he heard the knock on the front door. He rushed to the landing as Severus opened the door. Ron cringed.

"Mr. Crumb," Severus drawled.

"Um... Professor? I uh... maybe I... think I got the wrong--"

"Oh hello," Remus said, coming into the hallway. "Gideon, right? Here to pick up Ron?"

"Yeah."

"Would you like to come in?" Remus asked.

"Um...sure."

Ron came down the stairs, hoping to get them both out of the house without too much more awkward meet and greet.

"Hello," he said, not thinking about how weird it was going to be until he was standing there in that crowded, thin hallway with the other three.

"Come in, come in," Remus said, stepping into the sitting room and gesturing them all to join him.

Gideon looked terrified between Remus and Severus and Ron decided to save him. "We should probably get going, yeah?"

"Yeah? We don't want to be late."

"Oh," Remus said sounding disappointed. "Okay, well another time then."

Ron and Severus both looked like they wanted to kick him, but Gideon laughed nervously. "Yes, definitely, next time."

Pushing him out the door, he turned and waved to Severus and Remus standing on the porch.

They had gotten around the corner before Gideon said anything.

"Um...what was that?"

"What?" Ron asked, not sure what part he wanted explained.

"We were just in the company of the most reviled professor of Hogwarts and a werewolf? Why?"

"That's where I live," Ron said, feeling an odd bristle at the tone Gideon was using about his friends.

"How did that happen?"

"They took me in after I ran away from home and society. They've been really good to me," he finished with what he hoped was a subtle warning.

It seemed to have worked. Gideon just nodded. "That's cool. Still, what are the odds? I didn't even know they were gay, let alone together."

"Yeah, it came as a surprise to me too. Almost as much as finding out you're a famous musician, why didn't you tell me?"

Gideon laughed. "I did, remember?"

"I thought you were joking."

"I was. I don't think I'm anything that anyone would call famous. Especially not someone like you."

"What does that mean?"

"Well I mean. You were more famous then I'll ever be by the time you were twelve."

"I was?"

Gideon laughed. "You really don't know, do you?"

"Know what?"

Gideon stepped in front of Ron, causing him to stop. "How extraordinary you are."

Ron grinned. "You are delusional. I like that in a man."

"Yeah? What else you like in a man?"

Ron swallowed, hoping he wasn't as red as he felt. "Honestly?" and he didn't know how honest he wanted to be, but he plunged in anyway. "I don't really know. I've never really thought about it too much."

"Really?" Gideon said, giving him that predatory look again. "When I was young and randy I thought of little else."

"And now that you're older and randy?"

Gideon laughed. "Yeah, pretty much the same."

They continued walking again.

"So, what are we doing tonight?" Ron asked, feeling more relaxed.

"Well, there's a band playing nearby that I've been wanting to check out, if that's cool?"

"Sounds good."

The club was quiet when they showed up, the opening band was just getting started and Ron hoped the other bands playing would be better. Thankfully they were. Either that or the drinks were stronger than Ron would have made them. Either way, by the time that the headliners made their way to the stage, Ron was really into it and having a really good time. He watched Gideon from the corner of his eye. He watched as Gideon licked his lips and drummed his fingers along the table with the beat and Ron knew that he was itching to have his bagpipes in his hands.

"You love playing, don't you?" Ron asked.

Gideon seemed to just notice what his subconscious mind was doing. "Yeah. It's the only thing I've been really good at. What about you?"

"I never learned how to play," Ron said with a smile.

"That's not what I meant. What are you good at?"

Ron shrugged. "I can make a mean martini."

Gideon laughed. "I'm sure you got lots of talents."

Ron was just drunk enough to recognize it as a line, and played along. "Lots," he agreed.

"You want to get out of here? Go somewhere we can talk?"

"Sure," Ron said, his heart beating furiously.

They walked out and started to walk aimlessly down the road.

"So, what happened with the Weird Sisters?" Ron asked. "I remember you played at the Yule Ball and then you just broke up."

"It was a lot of things," Gideon said evasively. "Creative differences."

"Really? Just like that?"

There was a long silence before Gideon confessed. "I fell for a member of the band but he didn't feel the same."

"Damn heteros!" Ron laughed.

"Yeah, something like that."

The way he said it made it clear to Ron that there was more to the story and that it was none of his business. He changed the subject. "And you've been with this other band since?"

"Merlin no. I'm in like about four bands now. Anything to pay the rent. They're all rather crap, but the one that plays at your place, the very crappiest of them all."

"Lucky us."

They both laughed.

"You have an amazing smile," Gideon blurted out.

"Um...thanks. I like yours too."

"There's been something I've been wanting to ask you all night," Gideon said.

"Yeah? Go ahead."

"Can I kiss you?"

"Really? Here?" Ron looked around to the deserted residential street.

"Good as place as any, yeah?"

"Okay."

They turned to each other and Ron watched as Gideon slowly leaned towards him. Right before their lips meet, Ron closed his eyes and pursed his lips, inhaling deeply with shaky breath. At the same time that Gideon's lips meet Ron's tentatively, his head tilted, his fingers lightly touching his cheek. Ron, reached his hand up to touch Gideon's cheek too, then tucking a piece of hair that had escaped from the ponytail behind his ear before putting his hand around the back of his neck, pulling him gently closer, opening his mouth slightly.

Gideon wrapped his other hand around Ron's waist and pulled too as he found Ron's tongue and swirled his around it. Ron moaned and grasped Gideon's belt buckle.

Breaking the kiss with a breathy gasp, Gideon said, "Maybe this snogging in public was a bad idea." Ron buried his head in Gideon's neck, wetting it with his tongue. "Should we go somewhere more private?"

Ron could barely control his want enough to nod as he began to suck the wet skin.

"Your place is closer, but--"

"It's cool, let's go there," Ron interrupted, not even caring anymore the amount of desperation that had seeped into his voice.

"Yeah?"

"Now."

He didn't remember how they got home and even how they got to his room, his next coherent thought was a casting a Muffliato with Gideon's teeth biting his lower lip. Then they were tugging off their clothes desperately and in the dark, the almost full moon the only light. Ron wanted to say something about this being his first and maybe to voice his feelings; what the words would be he didn't know, but Gideon's tongue was either in his mouth or on parts of his body that left him incoherent.

They found themselves on Ron's small bed and Gideon was on top of him, pressing his pelvis into Ron's, sliding along Ron's hip.

"Touch me," Gideon ordered in a whisper at Ron's ear.

"Touch you?" Ron asked, his hands already all over the other man.

"Stroke it," he clarified.

"Oh, right."

He reached down and found the man's warm erection and grasped it tightly at the base. Gideon moaned his approval. The man had his hands flat on the bed, pushing himself up over Ron and he inched his way up so that Ron had his hand against his own belly as it wrapped and stroked Gideon in long slow strokes. Ron had his other hand around Gideon's shoulder, pulling himself up so that he could suck the skin of Gideon's chest where there was no hair. The man had so much hair. And in the light of day, Ron might find that unattractive and odd, but right then? It was fuckin' hot as hell.

It was a long time before Gideon stopped moving on top of him. Ron looked at his face, he was biting his lip and his eyes were scrunched up tight and Ron knew what would come next. He was right. There was come all over his hand and Gideon slumped on him, losing the strength in his arms for a moment.

Ron again wanted to say something, anything, but he didn't know what and anyway, Gideon almost instantly had his tongue in his mouth again. Pushing Ron's legs apart, Gideon began to lay light kisses all over Ron's face, taking his chin in his mouth and sucking as he ran his thumb almost lazily over the head of Ron's cock.

"Your turn," he said as he worked himself down Ron's chest, licking, sucking and scraping his teeth along the skin all the while.

Ron had to remind himself to breathe. He also had to remember that this was something he wanted, no matter what it turned out to be. If it felt wrong, he'd know it; if it hurt, it would soon be over. That thought only lasted a moment and was replaced about the time that Gideon's mouth was sucking on the head of his cock before his only thought was, Fuckin' brilliant!

"Merlin! Fuck!" was about all he was capable of as Gideon's tongue slathered his cock before taking it in his mouth and sliding it in and out while sucking. He never wanted it to stop and yet it was over way before he was ready. When he come back from his post orgasmic euphoria, Gideon was there kissing him and the taste of his own come on the man's tongue wasn't nearly as disgusting as he would have thought. Granted, it wasn't orange sherbet, but it wasn't bad either.

"Thank you," he said nonsensically when the kiss was broken by Gideon who cuddled up against him.

"Was that your first blow job?"

"What gave me away?"

"I usually don't get thanked."

"Really? You're not good at it? I didn't find any fault."

Gideon thumped him in the ribs. "Oh, I get thanked if you know what I mean. I just don't get many men who say, 'Thank you' when I finish."

The back of Ron's mind rankled at that. Just how many men had Gideon been with? Was it really a good idea to start a relationship with someone so experienced when he knew next to nothing? He decided it was something to think on later. He put his arm around his shoulder and began lazily running his fingers up and down his arm. "And how are you usually thanked?"

"Oh, I'm sure we'll think of something."

***

The next morning he woke up late and jumped up. He looked down at Gideon's sleeping form and wondered what happened now. He hadn't thought last night would have actually happened on what was essentially his first official "first date" but he really didn't expect to have a man still in his bed the next day. He didn't know what to do, but he looked at his watch, realized how late it was and decided to get up and scrounge some breakfast for them before finding a nice way to sneak Gideon out.

Quietly opening the door of his room, he almost tripped over a tray lying in his doorway. On it was two cups of coffee, two plates of eggs and toast and the day's paper. Trying to push aside any embarrassment he might feel about just how they knew or assumed that he had brought Gideon home, he picked up the tray and slowly backed into the room, keeping as quiet as possible.

The whistle issued from the bed alerted him that he no longer needed to worry about waking anyone up. It also brought the blood to his cheeks yet again.

"Damn but I do like to watch your backside."

Ron turned around. "Yeah? When have you watched it before?"

Gideon sat up. "You have any idea how distracting it is to try and play the bagpipes while watching you clean tables and serve drinks?"

"Well, it's not exactly easy to concentrate on making drinks with your eyes all over me either," Ron retorted.

Gideon patted the bed next to him before taking the tray from Ron. "Maybe we'll have to find some way to relieve these tensions while at work from now on, yeah?"

Ron plopped down beside Gideon and kissed him before placing the tray on both of their laps. "Perhaps."

Gideon picked up his cup before asking. "So, what are your plans for today?"

"I've got to work pretty soon."

"The bar is open for lunch?"

"No. My day job is to work with Severus in his lab."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"I still can't believe you live with Snape and Lupin."

Ron took a drink from his coffee--it was just the way he liked it. "Well, it's not that strange. All you need to remember is that one of them has a bark that's worse then his bite and for the other, it's the other way around."

Gideon laughed. "Good to know."

They started eating. After, Gideon kissed Ron and got up to get dressed. Ron sprawled out on the bed to watch him.

"Are you working tonight?" Gideon asked.

"Not tonight, no. I have the next few nights off. When are you back?"

"Not until Friday. So, see you then?"

"Sounds good," Ron said.

"Good," Gideon leaned over to kiss Ron again, this time with a bit more heat and a bit more tongue. "I'll wear something special for you under my kilt."

Ron growled. "Can't wait."

Gideon walked to the door. "If you find that you truly can't wait, send me an Owl."

"Okay," Ron said to the man's retreating backside. Not bad yourself.

***

After finishing his breakfast and getting dressed, Ron went looking for Severus to get his assignments for the day and Remus to thank him. He was pretty sure it was Remus who had prepared the tray to let him avoid the awkwardness of his first morning after.

The kitchen was cleaned and empty and so was the sitting room and Ron was afraid that maybe Remus had already left for an assignment and he'd missed him. He decided to try the bedroom before going to Severus's lab.

"Hello?" he said in a loud whisper, lightly knocking on the door.

"Yes? Come in."

The room was dark with the shades drawn and only one candle in the corner burning. Ron could barely make out the figure bunched up under a light blanket.

"Remus?"

"Oh, good morning. Come in, sit down and tell me all about it. Remember, I'm decrepit and need to live vicariously through you."

"Yeah, no pressure," Ron said as he made his way to the bed and found a place to sit beside Remus. "How you feeling?"

"Oh, I'm fine, just needed a bit of rest. It's getting to be that time." He sounded resigned and only a bit sad.

"Can I get anything for you?"

"Just make me laugh, okay? Tell me a funny story."

"From last night?" Ron asked, racking his brain. All he could remember was what it felt like to have the other man's mouth around his dick, and that wasn't exactly ha-ha funny, or something he wanted to really tell Remus right now.

"Sure. Tell me where you went, what you did."

Ron told him almost all the detail of the previous night, picking out and enhancing the more entertaining bits, like how bad the first bands were and how he tripped over himself a few times.

"And did he kiss you goodnight?" Remus asked.

"Yeah. You could say that. Oh, thanks by the way, for the breakfast this morning."

"Breakfast?"

"Yeah. The tray of coffee and breakfast outside my door." Then it hit him. "You didn't do it, did you?"

"No. I've been in bed all morning."

Ron was speechless. Remus bumped his shoulder into Ron's. "Not quite the git you took him for, is he?"

Smiling, Ron nodded. "Speaking of, though, I should get to work."

"Alright."

"Can I do anything before I go?"

"No, that's okay. Just send Severus up here in a few hours. And thanks."

"For what?"

"For being here, for those stories. For bringing me out of my own mind for a bit."

"No problem. I'm happy to do it."

***

Ron spent all day wearing Severus down, and finally he relented.

"We'll try it."

They had been arguing back and forth for weeks but Ron was more convinced than ever after the morning with Remus that he was onto something. It had started when Severus began to tell Ron about all the work he'd done and the research and experiments he'd preformed to make the transformation as un-traumatic as possible. How he'd been trying to make it so that Remus retained as much of his human self as possible through the whole process. Ron asked what Severus did during the actual full moon and was told that Severus spent his time observing and taking notes.

"You don't engage with him?" Ron had asked.

"Of course not," Severus had replied and then had given him a long list of reasons why. To Ron they seemed to be hiding a deeper reason; something like fear, even now, of Remus's werewolf self.

"Wouldn't it be helpful to see how he reacts, what he retains?" Ron had asked.

Severus agreed and yet again had many reasons why he hadn't; one of them being that he couldn't be both second subject and observer.

"Well, it's a good thing I'm here now, isn't it?"

"You? I hardly think you are qualified to take notes and observations," Severus had said.

"I didn't mean me to observe, I meant me to engage him."

Severus had bristled to this idea immediately and as the weeks progressed his objections weren't nearly as vicious, but they were still objections. But Ron was relentless.

"I would be on the other side of the cage, out of arms reach. I will just sit there and talk to him, tell him stories, heck, sing to him."

"Sing to him? Don't you think he suffers enough?"

Ron had glared at him and they continued having these debates. Until finally he had won.

"You will not enter the room until Remus has transformed. He doesn't have to add anxiety about hurting you to his long list of worries. If he remembers your presence when he's back, then we will know that he is retaining some of his human mind. If he gets overly agitated by you or your scent you will leave. You will not give me any arguments. Do you understand?"

Ron nodded, afraid that he would ruin his chances if he were to say one word wrong. Severus sent him out on some errands and told him not to come back until two hours after the sun had set fully.

***

"...and you've worked out the kinks with the new ingredient?" Remus asked.

"Yes love, the headaches should be lessened," Severus answered, trying his best to soothe Remus's anxiety. He held out the steaming chalice.

"And you will be monitoring my reactions?"

"Yes, I will be here all night. Everything will be fine."

Remus swallowed and nodded. "So, all ready then?"

"Yes, and so are you," Severus said as Remus put the chalice to his lips and chugging it in one go, trying not to grimace against the vile taste. Severus really was trying his best to make it not so gruesome tasting.

He reached out to bring Severus to him for one last kiss, but saw the hair begin to grow and his nails begin to elongate and he recoiled away from Severus instead. Severus closed the heavy barred door just in time. The snarled howl drowning out the clang of metal on metal.

Severus stepped away from the cage, never turning his back.

Ron came down a few hours later with a fresh pot of coffee. "How is he?"

Severus pointed to the cage. "See for yourself."

Ron, who had been avoiding this first look, turned. There before him was a monster. The same monster he'd seen all those years ago and who filled his 14 year old slumber with nightmares. The cage was a slight comfort, of course, but it also made it markedly worse. Severus wasn't kidding about how much the animal in Remus hated to be in there. He was all fur, claws and teeth and he was snarling and nipping trying desperately to get at Ron.

Ron took a deep breath to steady his nerves. "Hey there puppy. Mind if I join you?"

The animal stopped for a moment and regarded Ron with its head cocked. Ron tried not to show the fear that was burning through his veins. He went to pull up a chair and a deep, throaty growl echoed through the room.

"Careful," Severus warned in a low whisper.

"Okay," Ron whispered, never taking his eyes off Remus. He was still growling menacingly, but Ron ignored it. "Hey big guy. What big teeth you have."

The beast raised his head and howled. Then began pacing back and forth.

"Alright, shall I get started?" Ron asked.

"Yes. Any idea what you're going to talk about?"

Ron shrugged. "A few. Any suggestions?"

"Just tell him stories. Don't worry if it appears he's listening or not, just keep talking. Whether you tell stories he's heard before, or was there for, or if you tell him things he's never heard doesn't matter, as both will give us different things to gauge."

Ron nodded and began telling stories; long stories with a lot of detail and funny asides. He told him about when his father took him to work as a wee one, and about some of Fred and George's funnier antics when he was small and tried so hard to crack into their special twin club, hoping for any of their attentions that didn't involve him being their guinea pig or butt of their jokes. He told him about the most defining moment of his life and how most of them took place on a train. How he met Harry and scowled at Hermione and also met the wise Remus who gave them chocolate and convinced them everything would be okay when it seemed all happiness had been sucked from the world.

As he continued to talk through the night he never really felt as if Remus was hearing anything through the whimpers, growls, howls and whining his animal self was doing. It didn't stop him though, he talked even when he heard Severus snoring behind him. By then Remus had settled down a bit as well. When he stopped hurling himself against the bars, when he stopped thrashing his arms out of the cage, trying to get to Ron, that was when Severus seemed to be lulled into a peaceful rest by Ron's voice more than Remus. It was right about the time that Ron was getting to his illustrious career as the Gryffindor Keeper where he was the Weasley King that Remus finally stopped pacing, stopped lunging at him and after circling a spot on the floor a few times, laid down.

He looked so peaceful like that and Ron had an insane desire to pat him, maybe scratch behind his ears, as if he had already forgotten that this same animal, just a bit ago had been trying desperately to rip him apart. Thankfully though, he was too far inside the cage for Ron to reach. He could just imagine how much trouble he would get in if he were to act on that dangerous and careless instinct. Instead he just continued to lull him into sleep by singing the song that accompanied the story.



"Weasley is our King,
Weasley is our King,
He didn't let the Quaffle in
Weasley is our King.

Weasley can save anything,
He never leaves a single ring,
That's why Gryffindors all sing:
Weasley is our King"


The sun was coming up when Ron finally stopped. He had become mesmerized by the slow rise and fall of Remus's chest and he was relieved that the night was over. He turned to see if Severus was sleeping sitting up or if he had, against his will of course, slumped over and made himself comfortable. He was sitting up and slumped at the same time in the most precarious, uncomfortable fashion that Ron was sure he was going to fall over onto the cement floor any moment. Ron was also sure the man would have a permanent bend in his back that would make him even more surly.


Ron stood up and approached him. Very carefully and very gently, he pushed Severus over on his side, lifting his feet up and removing one shoe and then the other. He Accio'd a blanket down to the dungeon and went to place it over the sleeping man's form. He saw Severus's forearm for the first time since the end of the war and stopped. Where his Dark Mark had stained his skin for almost two decades was now a red and pulsating scar. It looked as if Severus constantly picked and scraped at it; never letting it heal, never letting himself forget.


Ron knew about scars that never seemed to heal, that seemed to just fester and irritate no matter how you tried to push them away. And because Ron's most harrowing scars were in places he couldn't reach, he found himself reaching for Severus's with held breath. It might in fact be the dumbest thing he had ever done, and yet, he found he couldn't stop himself. He had an overwhelming desire to touch the man, to heal him in some way, even knowing it was ridiculous to even think it were possible. His fingers traced the lines of scar tissue and he breathed through his teeth in a nonsensical sing-song fashion without even being conscious of it. All he was aware of was how he would explain this if Severus were to wake up and also, he thought back to the beginning of his time in the house. Had he really thought that Severus wasn't worth the devotion that Remus paid him? It seemed an impossible thought now.


Severus took a deep shaky breath and Ron recoiled his touch and straightened up. Ron held his own breath until Severus grasped the blanket and pulled it over his shoulder, still asleep.


Making sure both men were out, Ron made his way back upstairs to his own room to go to bed himself. Severus had insisted that Remus not know that Ron had been down there; had ever been in any danger from Remus at all.


***


The next couple of days, Ron and Severus tried to gather from Remus if he remembered anything from the hours and hours that Ron had talked to him, but he didn't even remember Ron was there. When he found out he got furious at Severus, who turned around and got furious at Ron, because yeah, it was all his fault. Plus Severus was annoyed that it obviously hadn't worked.


The environment around the house was a bit tense for those few days. Thankfully for Ron, he had work and when he had work, he had Gideon. The day he came back for his first shift since their date, he had almost forgot that Gideon would be there and he'd have a surprise for Ron. When he watched him on stage though, in that kilt, he remembered and couldn't keep his eyes off the musician. Ron wanted to devour him right then and there. He had to wait though until after their second set. That was when Ron finally got a break from making drinks and could sneak away to meet Gideon in the back room.


"Hey," Ron said, following Gideon down the hall, trying to swallow his overwhelming desire to not appear sex crazed. "How have you--"


Gideon closed the door behind Ron and was instantly on him, kissing him into the wall, not wasting anytime. His fingers were already at the apron pulling at the knot around Ron's waist. He continued to kiss him as he worked off the apron; only breaking the kiss to pull it over Ron's head.


"Slow down," Ron said, surprising himself. "We got a bit of time, yeah?"


"Oh, it's not about time management, it's about need. I need your sweet mouth fuckin' me."


Ron swallowed. "Yeah?"


Gideon growled and took Ron's hand and guided it under his kilt to show Ron just how much. "It's been like this every since you walked in for your shift."


"Really?" Ron asked. Gideon was definitely hard, but what Ron noticed first was the slick material covering it. "I thought the tradition was that there be nothing worn under a kilt, especially by pipers?"


"True," Gideon said, rubbing his nose against Ron's. "But I said I would surprise you too."


"Yeah?" Ron asked, capturing Gideon's lower lip in his teeth before snaking his tongue deep into the man's mouth. Gideon opened his mouth wider, inviting Ron's tongue deeper, their teeth clanging before Gideon pulled away with a glazed look.


"Please," he begged. "Fuck me."


Ron nodded, licking his lips and sliding down the wall. Taking a deep breath before lifting up the kilt, he was prepared for almost anything. "Knickers?"


"Not just knickers; red, silk knickers. You like?"


Ron began stroking him through the fabric. "A lot."


"Yeah," Gideon hissed. "Like that."


Ron leaned in and put his face in Gideon's crotch, rubbing his cheek along the fabric, working up his nerve. He remember how it felt when Gideon had sucked him off earlier in the week and he hoped he could do the same. That had felt really good.


Sliding the knickers down Gideon's legs, Ron was momentarily shocked by the amount of hair around the other man's cock and balls. But then he made a "O" with his thumb and pointer finger and ran it down the length of Gideon's dick and his hand obscured most of the hair and then it was just the skin, purplish and veiny and he relaxed. He flattened and dragged his tongue up along the shaft and then took the tip in his mouth, swirling it with his tongue before sucking and slurping.


Gideon placed his hands flat against the wall and leaned his head against the brick and Ron felt sandwiched in between the man and the wall, the rock and a hard place as Gideon, supposedly fueled by need and desperation, thrust his cock deep into Ron's throat. In a panicked moment when he thought he was choking, Ron sputtered and pushed Gideon away, hard.


"Fuck!"


"Sorry, sorry, Merlin!" Gideon chanted as he got down on his knees in front of Ron. "I don't know why I did that, I didn't mean to."


Ron's heart began beating normally again and the flush that had worked its way from his chest to his face was receding. "It's okay. Just scared me a bit."


"I forgot you're new at this and I just... Merlin! I just want you so bad!"


"That's the way it's supposed to go?" Ron asked, terrified of the answer.


"No, no it's not. The one giving is supposed to be in control. I should have never... you know, unless you like it."


"No. I didn't like that."


Gideon bowed his head. "I really am sorry."


There was an awkward moment when they just looked at each other.


"So," Ron finally said, feeling foolish, "have we completely ruined the mood, or could we try this again properly? I'd hate to miss out on an experience here."


Gideon unbuttoned his kilt and pulled it away from him to show Ron that he was still hard, essentially answering Ron's question. Ron pounced on him, sprawling him onto the floor of the back room, pinning him down. "I want to be on top this time."


Gideon growled. "I promise, I'll let you do all the work."


Ron kissed him, hard; dominating his mouth with his tongue, biting his lower lip before making his way down his neck and chest, feeling a power he'd never experienced before. This time when he took Gideon's cock in his mouth, he set the pace, he decided how deep he sucked and how fast he bobbed his mouth up and down Gideon's dick. And when it was time for Gideon to come, it was Ron who decided what to do with the mouthful of it. Like anything in his mouth, his first instinct was to swallow it, but the shock of the salty substance stopped him and he straightened up, turned away and spat it out. He then reached for his wand, "Detergo."


"Sorry," he said, looking down at Gideon and seeing something on his face that he couldn't place.


"Don't be," Gideon gasped. "That was really good."


Ron sighed as he legged himself off of Gideon. That expression he couldn't place must be what it looked like to be satisfied. He liked that look. As he stood up, put his apron back on, tying it around his waist, ignoring his own erection, he smiled.


"What?" Gideon asked.


"Nothing. Just... that was fun."


"It was," Gideon said, standing up and putting his kilt back on. He picked up the knickers, and smiling, came to Ron. Reaching around him, he tucked them into the back pocket of his denims before kissing him. "Any time you want to do it again."


"Alright," Ron said into Gideon's neck. "What are you doing after work?"


Gideon laughed. "This apparently."


***


"You've been getting home later and later these days," Remus said a few weeks later when Ron came down to the kitchen looking rumpled, exhausted and well fucked. He was in actuality all of those things, but he had the sense to look slightly ashamed.


"Yeah. Sorry about that. It's just the only time Gideon and I both have free to see each other."


"No need to apologize," Remus began. "You're a grown man who can spend his time any way he chooses. Maybe though, you're stretching yourself too thin and we should maybe put off some of our field trips for a bit."


"No. I'm fine, really. I really can't wait to see the tombs."


"Good," Severus said. He rose from his seat having already finished both his breakfast and his newspaper. "Because I don't care how late you're up playing the pipes, we have orders to fill in the day time hours."


"Yes sir," Ron said. He was just about to snipe though that maybe Severus should wait until he actually didn't show up to work before he got all bitchy, but the words were stopped in his throat. He had noticed that Remus, who had stood up and started clearing the table, was humming a familiar tune.


"What is that song?" Ron asked, knowing the answer but wanting to know if Remus did.


"I don't know but I can't get it out of my head. It's been there for over a week and it's making me crazy!"


"Do you know the words?" Ron asked.


Severus turned, apparently noticing Ron's excited tone in the seemingly meaningless question.


"No, and that's what's making me mad, there right there on the tip of my tongue, in a corner of my mind that it almost tickles and yet I can't scratch it. Why? Do you know?"


"Oh yeah, I know it," Ron said standing right in front of Remus. "It goes like this:


"Weasley is our King,

Weasley is our King,
He didn't let the Quaffle in
Weasley is our King.

Weasley can save anything,
He never leaves a single ring,
That's why Gryffindors all sing:
Weasley is our King


"I sang it to you during the full moon."


Severus and Remus froze, but Ron, overcome with emotion wrapped his arms around Remus and began bouncing. "Do you know what that means? Do you?"


Remus didn't move, didn't say anything, seemed to still be shocked. Severus however approached slowly. "Are you sure?"


"Sure I sang it? Yes, right before I went to bed."


"But are you sure he'd never heard it before?"


"Oh," Ron slumped slightly and let go of Remus. "Maybe. It was all the rage during my sixth year. But still, that was a long time ago and it wasn't like Remus was there a lot. I mean, you were exposed to it more then he was, do you go around humming it?"


"No," Severus said slowly, as if optimism and hope were battling against years of cynicism and failure. "But we can't be sure. Not without proper testing and--"


"Oh Severus, can't we be happy? Just for a minute? Believe? For just a fraction of a second?"


Severus's lip twitched as if maybe optimism was winning out. He nodded slightly. "If you must."


Remus and Ron embraced again and began bouncing around the kitchen; Ron's enthusiastic optimism catching them all up in it. They wound up in a huddle of an embrace in the middle of the kitchen.


"Moment over. Back to work," Severus said.


"Yes sir," Ron said, untangling himself. He stopped when he felt Severus pat him on the back, then Remus rustled his hair. Ron smiled at both of them and went to the coffee pot and poured himself a cup before following Severus to the lab.


For the first time since working with Severus on the project-- the enigma of Remus-- he finally felt as if he had contributed something useful. That was a feeling that wasn't going to go away, no matter how many doubts Severus would throw at him in the next few weeks. They had their starting point, a piece of the puzzle. Music. It was a breakthrough, a small one perhaps, but Ron was inspired and even more dedicated to the task.


***


Severus worked himself and Ron even harder in the weeks after. Remus too, seeming to feel energized in a new way, took Ron out on even more excursions to further and further away sites, occasionally staying for days. Some of those times Severus would come with them, but mostly it was Ron and Remus spending hours at each famous or historical site in a given city until they felt as if they had gotten enough information for that week's lessons.


Because of these intensified lessons and work hours with Remus and Severus, he didn't get to spend too much time with Gideon. He did, however, learn a lot from the hours they spent together as well. He learned that he liked to fuck someone up the arse more than being fucked himself; he liked sucking just as much as someone sucking him, but what he thought was brilliant that he'd never even heard of was when Gideon had his tongue up Ron's arse, licking and sucking him, while they stroked each other, until Ron balled whatever was handy in his fist and screamed into a pillow. Thank Merlin for silencing charms, he often thought on the nights that they wound up at his house. Despite the fear the next day when, early in the morning, he walked Gideon down the stairs and out the door trying not to be discovered, he'd still rather be at his house then the flat that Gideon shared with a handful of random people. Not that Ron thought Severus and Remus would forbid it, or even object if they knew, he'd just rather not talk about it. He was embarrassed enough when Remus would comment on the well-fucked look Ron would appear at the kitchen table with every few nights.


Standing behind the bar, he wasn't quite so distracted as he had been in the beginning of their relationship. He'd learned how to do his job while imagining what would happen in a few hours time. He could now work with a erection that had become a quiet ache rather then a raging pain screaming to be satisfied. He rather liked the ache now, something about discipline and denial that made the relief of orgasm even more rewarding and well deserved later.


"What can I get you?" he asked the new customer he sensed walk in even though his eyes hadn't left the stage. The night was slow and he was just contemplating motioning for the band to take a break so he could ravish Gideon quickly.


"You could give me a proper greeting," the customer said. Ron, recognizing instantly that voice even though he hadn't heard it in months, turned his head sharply.


"Harry!"


"Hey," he said coming to the bar, his face a jumble of emotions. "How have you been?"


Ron nodded his head ridiculously. "Alright, alright. You?"


"Good," Harry said with a shrug, then as if he hadn't meant to, continued, "I've missed you."


"Really? I've... I've missed you too. Missed all of you."


"Yeah? Why haven't you contacted any of us?" Harry sat at the closest bar stool.


"Honestly? I've just been busy," Ron said, looking up when he noticed the music had stopped.


Harry followed his eyes. "Oh, right, busy."


"What? No..." Ron stammered. "I mean... yeah... but not just... hey, how did you know I was working here?"


"Remus told me."


"Remus? You've been talking to Remus?"


Harry looked hurt and Ron instantly regretted saying it.


"He's my friend too. Were we supposed to divvy up our friends when you left?"


"No, I didn't mean that. I just... well he never told me."


"How often do you see him?" Harry asked.


"Remus?" Ron asked back, now throughly confused. "I'm living with him. Didn't he tell you that?"


"You're living with him? Like living, living?"


"What? Merlin no! Why would you even say that? He's in a committed relationship. You just assume that all gay--"


"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Harry said, putting up his hand as if surrendering. "Man, this used to be so much easier. We used to know, without having to even say, what each other were thinking. Can we start over?"


Ron took a deep breath. He probably had overreacted he thought to himself. "Yes, let's."


Harry spun on his seat, paused and then turned around again. "Ron, what a surprise. I didn't know you worked here!"


Ron smiled. "Can I get you a drink?"


"Ah, I would love a pint."


"So, how have you been? How is everyone?"


"I'm good, we're all good I think. We all miss you, Ron."


Ron put a napkin down and Harry's drink on top of it while giving him a look.


"All of us."


"Right."


"Probably her the most. You do remember you were friends years before you were anything else. She misses that."


"I do too. Harry, my life is nothing like I'd imagine it would be. I've learned more and done more then I ever thought I would. I'm a different person now."


Harry turned and looked at the band behind them. "I see that," he said turning back.


"It's not just about that, about him," Ron said, wanting to once again reach over and smack Harry. Did he really think Ron's life, his happiness and satisfaction from life had everything to do with sex?


"I didn't say anything about just sex, you did. I just asked if he made you happy. Which one by the way?"


Ron pointed to Gideon while his mind raced with had just implied. Did he really think that Gideon was just for sex? In the time that it took Harry to turn, look the way he was pointing, check out Gideon and them turn back with a approving nod, Ron had found his answer. Yes. Yes he did. He hadn't started the relationship with that as the only goal. Gideon was really one of the first people he'd meet who he hadn't known almost half his life. He thought that would be exciting and he'd be able to discover new things and constantly be surprised. The only thing was, they really had very little in common. Ron didn't know anything about the bagpipes and he didn't really care that much about the life of a musician, the nights on the road, the gigs, the hotels, the boys.


"Now," Harry said, pulling Ron back from his own reeling mind. "Tell me about Remus. You know you just outed him back there. I didn't even know he was gay."


Ron remembered his outburst and again hung his head in shame. "I'm sorry. And now I feel horrible about that as well. Though, I don't think he hides it as much as he doesn't flaunt it."


"How did it happen that you are living with him? And his partner? You said he was in a committed relationship?"


Ron decided to answer the first question first. The second one might be too much for Harry to handle; besides the idea of outing Severus too was more then Ron wanted to contemplate. "Well, remember the last time we talked? How you said there had to be others? Others that could help me? Well, I found Remus. Or more specifically, he found me."


"And it seems to be a good thing?"


"They saved my life."


"Really?" Harry asked with a note that indicated that Ron was being over-dramatic.


Ron smiled. "Well maybe not so much saved as made it worth living."


And then it hit him just how true that was; how minus the obvious of the sex, he'd been complete by his association with both Remus and Severus.


"How?" Harry asked.


Ron told him about their attempt to make a Renaissance man out of him, how they were teaching him more then he learned in the six years at Hogwarts. It was hard to keep Severus's name out of it, but about halfway through the conversation, it became unnecessary, Harry figured it out.


"Remus's partner, it's Snape, isn't it?"


"What makes you say that?" Ron asked, shocked. Harry'd never been that observant before.


"Just a hunch. It's the way you talk about the Dark Arts, the tone you use while discussing the subtle science and the exact art of potions."


"Why aren't you going mental right now?" Ron asked.


Harry shrugged and took a last swig of his pint. "You think you're the only one who has grown and matured since we've last seen each other? For me though, I think my Snape rage has been lessening for years now. How long can you hold a grudge for someone being mean to you as a child?"


"I guess it depends on how mean. How's the family?" Ron asked.


They laughed and then Harry told Ron about the Dursleys' fate and that led to Ron's family and then finally to Hermione.


"I know I keep saying this, but it's true, she really does miss you. And I'm not just saying that to guilt you into contacting her. She understands--"


"Merlin I hate that word! She understands that I am flawed. She'd expected me to hurt her."


"What would you rather?"


"I don't know." And he didn't, he only knew that he hated feeling this way. He took a deep breath. "Forgive me. In my real life, I'm not this much of an arsehole, I promise. But you see why I stay away? I'm not fit for human interaction."


"And here we are again; me reaching out and you pushing away."


Ron didn't know what to say. He'd already apologized and none of it mattered anyway. He wasn't going to be able to give Harry what he wanted.


This time when Harry walked out, it felt like the breaking away he'd expected the time before. But also, a bit like a death.


***


"I thought I was going to have to drag you out of bed this morning," Remus said. They were touring Notre Dame again. Remus loved the place, it had all the things that he loved the most: European history, religious history, literary history, architecture, sanctity, romance and of course the macabre. And since Ron liked observing Remus giddy about things as he showed him all the significant bits over and over, the kept returning. "Weren't you going out with Gideon after work last night?"


"Nah, I wasn't up to it."


"Yeah? Everything okay between you two?"


"Oh yeah. I was just exhausted after the conversation I had with Harry."


"Harry?"


"Thanks for that, by the way."


"I'm sorry. I didn't tell him so that he could come and give you a hard time. I just saw him and we got to talking and he said he was worried about you. I told him I had seen you and that you seemed fine and were working at the Pub."


"You didn't want him to know I was staying with you?"


"What, no, I just didn't know if you wanted him knowing. I figured your work is one thing, he could have found that out anywhere, but where you live? That's your story to tell. I would have told you I talked to him, but truthfully, it happened the day before yesterday and I didn't think he'd go the minute he knew."


"It's alright. It was sort of good that I saw him, talked to him. Made me realize that I'm not as put together as I had thought."


"Yeah?"


"Yeah. I mean he's really trying to be nothing but supportive and I just keep pushing him away."


"How so?"


"I was horrible to him. It was like I couldn't help myself. And most of what I said was crap I don't even believe anymore. As if I want to be the victim and to be regaled with anger and hatred. I mean... is there something inside of me... something that wants to be... punished? That... needs--"


He didn't realize how worked up he was until he felt Remus wrap his arms around him for a tight embrace. Ron returned it by holding tight to Remus's jacket at the shoulder blades, right there in the Sacristy. Thankfully it wasn't technically open, so it was deserted. That was another thing that Remus really loved; Breaking and Entering.


They just held each other, Remus's hand cradling Ron's neck and lower back and sort of swaying them soothingly, all the time whispering a hushed shhh, shhh. Ron had to admit it felt really nice, like he could stay there like that, holding him and being held, forever. However, it only lasted a moment before Remus pulled away slightly and took Ron's face in his hands. For a heart racing moment, Ron thought Remus was going to kiss him and he was both terrified and excited about the possibility.


"You are a good person, Ronald Weasley. One day soon you'll come to terms with that. I promise it."


Ron sighed and felt ridiculous.


He let go of Remus's jacket, not even realizing he was still clutching it and stepped back further, smiling awkwardly. And then, not because he really wanted to talk about it, but because he needed something else to say to deflect, he said, "Also, the talk with Harry made me realize that I should probably break up with Gideon."


"What?" Remus asked, looking as if he were trying to do the math of that combination in his head. "Okay, you know what, this conversation needs scones, don't you think?"


Ron laughed. "Definitely."


***


"No. Absolutely not," Severus said, rolling away from Remus in the bed they shared.

"No?" Remus said, sitting up slightly to lean against the headboard and observe Severus.

"Really this time. Like putting-my-foot-down no. Like beyond-bad-idea no. Flat-out-refusal no."

"I'm getting that. But I need a why, why is it a bad idea, why are you absolutely, positively ruling it out? Give me reasons, not refusals."

Severus gave him an incredulous look. "Are you serious? There are nothing but reasons." He raised his hand, starting to count off on his fingers. "He's a child. He's not ready for a relationship, let alone the one you're suggesting, and what makes you think he'd be interested anyway?"

"Lets say I have a hunch. I think you have one too."

Severus looked down. "But I still have those reasons, all of them valid."

"You know what I heard in that list?"

"What?"

"All the reasons Ron would be wise to choose differently. None of those were your reasons. Could it be that you no longer have any?"

"I have many."

"Like?"

"Like how the mere suggestion of it might ruin everything good and pure that already exists between us all. Like how you are mine. I earned you."

Remus pounced on him, straddling his waist and nuzzling into his neck. "I adore you too," Remus whispered.

Severus wasn't going to be swayed so easily this time. "What in our life together suggests that I'm a sharer, that I'm confident enough to invite someone younger, better looking, and now, thanks to our tutelage, almost as articulate as I into our bed?"

"But don't you see," Remus began, sitting up, still straddling Severus. "Because of our tutelage we've made him a young man that needs people of our ilk to feel anything like complete. Whether he's always had it in him, or whether we put it there, he's now a man who needs not only physical satisfaction, but also intellectual and emotional stimulation as well. I mean, Severus, the man would rather abstain from sex and live happily here, working with you, caring for me, taking what we are willing to give him then be out being a normal young adult with a raging libido. Is that fair for him?"

"Are you suggesting that we've ruined him for other men?"

Remus laughed. "Yes love, that's exactly what I'm suggesting."

They continued the debate and for the first time in a long time, Remus wasn't convinced he'd won at the end. But when Severus sat up, circled his arms around Remus and quicker and stronger then Remus remembered he was capable of, flipped them around so that Severus was now on top, Remus decided that winning could wait. What was important was that he would live to fight another day. He had every confidence in his side being victorious.

***


"Come in," Severus called out.

Ron stood on the other side of the door. Apprehension itched out of him at the same time he swore at himself to stay calm. The problem was, they had started all wrong and Ron felt a sense of doom.

Instead of just coming into the library like he did everyday to study, or on his way to the lab, he had hovered outside of it, waiting for an invitation. That was the first mistake. The second one was being so solemn and ill-at-ease with Severus where usually, these days, they got on rather well together and had a mutual respect and trust that Ron felt proud that he had earned. Now he stood before him and the hazy and terrifying image of Professor Snape loomed at him, even though the man was being nothing but courteous and inviting.

Ron swallowed and forced himself to swallow his nervousness, which of course, only heightened it. He knew it really wasn't Severus he was afraid of. It was his own mind and all the jumbled thoughts and images that he could spew into Severus's head that had him about ready to hyperventilate. It was one thing to have your very best mate see all the weaknesses and fear in your stunted 18 year-old mind, but having Severus with access to his deepest, darkest and having the intelligence to know what all the thoughts actually meant.

"Ron," Severus started and Ron jumped as if he forgot where he was for a moment. "You need to relax."

Ron nodded. "Okay."

"Now, I'm sure Harry has told you a bit about what the experience is like, so I won't--"

"No. He didn't. I think that's one of the reasons I'm so nervous. Harry told me everything, but those hours in your office, he wouldn't talk about."

"Alright, then come sit down. We'll talk. We don't have to begin today. We can start by talking more about it."

"Thanks, but I think we should start. I've been reading about it, been bothering you with questions about it, and I think if I put it off any longer it will just get scarier and scarier. Besides, I trust you."

Severus bowed his head. "Very well. However, to ease your mind I present you with this option." He pulled out two vials from his desk. "A bit of a Memory Loss Draft I've been working on. It affects very short periods of time without the side effects that Forgetfulness Potions and the Oblivate Spell risk. If you've shown me something you wish for me to forget, at the end of the session I promise to take the potion."

"That seems fair," Ron said after expelling a relieved breath. "What is the other vial for?"

"Ah, that's for you. In the case that you happen to see anything that I'd rather you didn't, I ask you to pay me the same favor."

"Of course."

"Shall we begin?"

Nodding, Ron pulled out his wand.

"Now, your first task is to try to close your mind. My job is to try and penetrate it. Once I've done that--"

"If you do that," Ron corrected with a smile, starting to feel more relaxed.

Severus rolled his eyes. "Alright Gryffindor, if I do that, your new goal will be to force me out, using any combination of spells, hexes or curses you can, with the exceptions of the Unforgivables of course."

"Is this safe? I'm not a ickle fifth year now. I could hurt you."

Severus actually looked like he was trying hard not to laugh. Great, Ron thought, the first time I get to see him laugh and it's at my expense.

Clearing his throat, Severus said, "Remus will be standing by in case anything goes horribly wrong."

"Alright. Let's go."

Ron stood before him and he pulled his wand and held it out to Ron. "Legilimens!"

Ron was expecting it and still he felt caught completely unawares. For a fraction of a second he stood against the odd sensation of his mind being battered, as if looking for the weak spot. Bit by bit, though, he felt his strength lessen, felt an almost liquid feel in his head and he found it was hard to stand up as wave after wave of images and emotions attacked like they were high tide and he was seaweed.

He's in a cold forest, frozen wet. Harry is beside him holding a locket. He is breathing through gasps as all his worst fears dance before them.

He knew in the rational, present part of his mind that this is because that memory was very close to the surface as he prepared for these lessons. It was one of the things he didn't want Severus or anyone else to see, so of course it is there, just waiting. Ron raised his wand but the words wouldn't come out.

Hermione is in his arms and his stomach has turned to molten lead as he realizes the thing he feared the most was true, that he couldn't make himself feel what he had been trying for years.

Then there's Dobby, and Colin and he sees Lavender's ravished body and then before him is Fred and it's like he can reach out and touch him and maybe he tries. Then Fred's gone. He's sitting at the Sunday dinner table, and there before him is his mother clutching a tissue as she shakes her head back and forth over and over. His father is there with his head in his hands and his eyes slammed shut, like if he doesn't see it, if he doesn't see this room and these people that he thought he knew, then it wouldn't be true that he didn't know his youngest son at all. Then there's Hermione and her lip is quivering and she's nodding her head, putting on her strong face, setting a good example.

Ron shouted out a curse; he didn't know which one and he didn't care. It wasn't that the thoughts were that horrific, or that he was that embarrassed about them, he just wasn't ready to see that look on Hermione's face. He realized though, these were the thoughts that were easiest to find because they were the ones always on his mind.

Severus approached slowly. "Very good."

Ron looked up to gauge his reactions to what he'd seen. He looked non-plussed, even though his hands were the size of balloons. "Sorry."

"No apology required. You did exactly what you were supposed to do. I told you any curse that worked."

"Should we... um... take care of that?" Ron asked, pointing to Severus's engorged hands.

"Not to worry." He shook them out and they deflated. He picked his wand back up and flicked it; the skin reformed and tightened. "Shall we continue?"

"Oh, alright," Ron said, taken aback.

"That wasn't too taxing was it? I mean, if you need time."

"No, you're right, we should carry on. I mean, I was a little overwhemed while it was happening and I won't say it was a fun experience, but I'd like to see if I could fight it off better this time."

"Very well. Ready?"

Ron nodded and this time when Severus barked out, "Legilimens!" he was ready; maybe. He saw Severus's beady black eyes and felt the man burrowing into his head. For a long time he thought he was going to be able to hold him off for good. But then he started to sway on his feet, as if being put into some sort of trance.

He was in an alley and so was Draco. Pants around their thighs as they rubbed against each other, tongues, teeth and hands everywhere.

He knew he should be humiliated by the images he's sharing, but he couldn't quite muster it. He knew he should be trying to stop Severus from seeing anymore, but there was a part of him that wanted the man to see. His eyes swirled as he was bombarded with a collage of images.

Draco has turned to Gideon and kissing has turned to other things. Fingers are everywhere, mouths are licking, kissing, biting and sucking. All the while there is thrusting, sweating and moaning. Then there is Ron, on his knees, his back against a wall, Gideon before him. Gideon's cock in his mouth and then he's choking...

Suddenly there was a rage inside of him that didn't belong to him. His eyes focused and there was Severus and Ron hadn't seen him look that angry since the Hogwarts days. Then something happened and Ron reeled from the strength of it. His eyes fluttered and closed.The visions that were coming now weren't his alone. They washed over him, images of Remus and of Severus and of him, but they weren't all his, Severus's thoughts came too and though they were mellow, peaceful images of simple things like sharing a meal, hunched over books, or walking the halls of the British Musuem, Ron could feel what Severus felt. He imagined Severus felt the same as they traipsed through Ron's thoughts.

Even though he felt his energy being sapped with each image that flashed through their mind's eye, putting a stop to it was now the last thing Ron wanted to do. That was until a new image came to his mind, an image he had even forgot he had stored there.

He is standing at the bottom of the stairs and he is looking up to the landing where Remus and Severus are practically dry humping themselves through the wall. He just stands there, watching and the only thing he thinks is hunger.

Ron's rational mind screamed to stop, but of course it rebelled, because when had it ever done what he'd begged? Instead it pulled up another scene.

He's standing at the doorway and he's biting his lip. His eyes are glazed over and he looks like he's about to explode with want.

He was crying out now, it needed to stop. He knew what was going to be revealed and he watched in horror...

"Stuppa!" Severus exclaimed. The room stilled.

Ron was panting and his legs were buckling underneath him, but he couldn't take his eyes off of Severus. The man just stared at him, like he wanted to say something, do something but he couldn't. Ron felt the same way. Part of him wanted to evaporate into thin air and never be seen again, another part wanted to do nothing at all, just shrug and laugh and say something benign. The last part though, the part that was the loudest, didn't want to hide anymore--not in inaction and not in pithy words that meant nothing. He looked at Severus and his heart slowed and with the last bit of strength he had left, he stepped forward.

Severus caught him and they stumbled to the ground. Neither of them spoke, they just held on to each other. Then Ron wrapped his arm around Severus's neck and pulled him to him, without asking, without gauging his chances, he kissed him, gentle and sweet but with a trace of that hunger, of that need they had just seen.

***

After a moment, Ron broke the kiss and laid his head on Severus's chest and an instant later, Severus felt his weight shift in sleep. He sat there stunned. He heard footsteps and looked up relieved. "Remus... he... kissed me."

Remus smiled gently. "I saw that."

"Why?"

"It looked like it was because he really wanted to."

"Why me?"

Remus bent down with his knees and took Ron in his arms. With a bit of magical help, he lifted the man almost effortlessly. "Why not you?"

Severus got up and followed Remus up the stairs. He didn't have an answer. He might not have been as overwrought and as exhausted as Ron had been, but his mind was still muddled and he felt drained. That was the only explanation he had for following Remus into their bedroom where he had laid Ron on their bed and climbing in beside Ron while Remus lay on the other side.

Remus on his elbow, looked down at them. "What do you see?"

"I saw what you already knew. That we make him happy. That we deserve him, and he deserves us. All of us."

Remus laid his head gently on Ron's shoulder and reached for Severus's hand. Sighing, he said, "We all deserve it. We've earned this."


***THE END***

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